Author's Notes: Ok, I know it may seem like I’ve been on a bit of hiatus for a while, but I’ve really been working on four new slash fics, along with my ‘A New Beginning’ one as well. I’ve discovered that it’s much easier to get several chapters written and then post one, then it is to post a chapter and not have a very good idea on what the next one exactly is to be about. Well, it’s easier for me at least. And now on with my dumb fic!

DISCLAIMER: No, I don't own any of the characters....

Where Did All the Guys Go?

Chapter 6 - The Fall of Semes : The Ukes’ Master Plan!

By Sapphire17

So basically at this point, Kazuya, Jin, Bryan, and Paul, had just heard that Lee, Hwoarang, Lei, and Forest had been in a wreck, and are now in critical condition…


“…This is NOT funny, dad!!!” Jin yelled out rather loudly.

“Fuck no it’s not!!!” Bryan agreed.

“…No…it…it’s true…”

“I don’t believe this!” Paul spat as he now went over to the phone and looked at the caller ID.  “See, it’s really—…the hospital……”

“WHAT??!!” Bryan and Jin both simultaneously exclaimed…

Bryan now went over to take a look at the caller ID himself, and sure enough, Paul and Kazuya had been right…

“No…”  Bryan muttered, “How bad is it…”

“It…it’s bad…”

“Ex-excuse me for a second, guys…” Paul whispered as he exited in to the neighbouring room…

“…Me too…” Bryan muttered as he walked off…

“Oh god…” Kazuya then buried his face in his hands.  “This is all my fault…  If I hadn’t of, then Lee wouldn’t have, then none of this would have…”

“…We, we need to get down there right away!” Jin demanded.

“Yes son, you’re right…  Bryan?!  Paul?!”

Bryan then walked back in, like a zombie.  Well, you know…

“…I see you have bee crying…too…” Jin muttered.

“No *sniff* I have not!!...”

Paul then came back into the den as well.  “I just had to go to the restroom to wash my face.  I used water.  That’s why it’s wet…yea…”

Kazuya knew they were both lying, but he could really care less at the moment.  “Well, I guess we should, ya know, go down there now…”

Everyone then silently agreed, as they now exited the mansion, and made their way to the circular drive.

“…Do you want to take my car?” Jin asked.

“Jin!  How can you even think about joking at a time like this?!” Kazuya spat.

“…Er, it wasn’t a joke…”

“Whatever, we’re NOT taking your… ‘car’…”

“That’s not a car…not-at-all…” Paul shook his head.

“…Shut up you guys…*sniff*…”




“Are you guys sure this is going to work?” Forest asked.  Currently, he, Lei, Hwoarang, and Lee were all at the local hospital, which was just about a twenty-minute drive from Lee’s house, where Kazuya and the others had just left from…

“Trust me,” Lee assured, “This will work.” 

Basically, Lee had paid a good number of hospital employees a good amount of money to go along with this temporarily, while Lei had assured them they would receive no trouble with the law for any of this if they agreed.  What was suppose to happen, is when the others arrived, they would be told they were too late, and that they had already died.  Then, after secretly watching the reactions from them, the ukes would come out the doors to laugh at them…  Not very nice at all…

They were now all in the emergency waiting room.

“Hmm…” Hwoarang thought, “But what if someone who would recognize us was to suddenly show up?”

“Nah, I don’t think so,” Lee replied.

“And besides,” Lei added, “What are the odds of that?”


Everyone then turned their heads to see…

“Oh no…” Hwoarang muttered…  “It’s Julia…”

*Everyone Sweatdrops…

Julia then ran over to them immediately afterwards, as she gave Hwoarang a big ol’ hug.


“Oh, sorry Hwoarang.  I guess I got carried away there.”

“It’s ok.” Not really.

“So,” she continued, “Whatever are the four of you doing down here together?  Oh my gosh, has somebody you know been hurt?!”

“Um, no.” Hwoarang shrugged.

“Then what are you doing down here?”

“What are YOU doing here, Julia?” Lei now asked. 

“Well, you see I, well, fine.  I’m trying to become a nurse here temporarily, just for the summer.”

Oh god I’m going to make sure I NEVER get hurt now!! “Um, that’s cool,” Hwoarang nodded, “You know, I think I’ll go get a coke from that vending machine over there.”

Julia smiled, “Coke is bad for you.”

*Lee, Lei, and Forest try not to laugh.

Damnit!  Ok, just don’t ‘lose you cool.’   “NO it’s not!”

“Yes it is, I can show you the before and after effects of it.”

Hwoarang then turned and walked away to get his coke, as Julia followed him…

“Hahaha.” Forest laughed, “Remind me to feel sorry for him!”

Lee sighed, “Try having the William sluts all over you 24-7…”

“Oh yea,” Lei spoke up, “Do any of you have any idea how Anna Williams was murdered at the dance?”

“Hmm,” Lee thought.  Duh!  Kazuya zapped the hell out of ‘it’.  “Nope, I haven’t a clue.”

“Hey,” Forest remembered something, “Didn’t Heihachi die?”

Lee blinked, “Who gives a damn?”

“Not me,” Lei declared, “I heard he killed himself, wonder why?”

Just then, a loud explosion was heard from across the large room, as everyone turned to see the Cola machine erupting out endless sodas.

“It’s not my fault!!!” Hwoarang yelled.  The machine had stolen a quarter from him, so in response, he had kicked the crap out of it.

Everyone then went over to get a soda off the ground, who was within range to see the cans lying about the floor.

“So really,” Julia began, “What are you doing here?”

Hwoarang sighed, “Do you really want to know, Julia?”

She nodded.

“Fine, well you see, me and the other guys over there are pulling a prank on Jin, Kazuya, Bryan, and Paul.  They think we were in a wreck!”

Hwoarang was expecting Julia to laugh, but she didn’t.  “That’s not very nice!  What would you do if you heard I was in a wreck?”

“Hmm…”  Hip hip hurray!  “Well, that’s not important, just make sure you DON’T tell anybody!”

A nurse then came out of a neighbouring hall to enter the waiting room.  “Ok guys, you can come back here and wait now.”

Hwoarang, Lee, Lei, and Forest then all went back into the ‘emergency patients clinic’ where they would wait until the semes arrived.

Julia then rolled her eyes as she watched their backs recede.  Yea, what a tight ass!!


At this time, Kazuya, Jin, Bryan, and Paul were all seated in the back of Kazuya’s limo as the driver floored the petal to get to the hospital faster.

“You know,” Kazuya began as he broke the silence, “I had never really thought about how I would respond to a situation like this…The truth is, I don’t…think I could live without Lee… him and his nagging for cigarettes all of the time, and taking five hours to get ready to go somewhere…”

Bryan nodded, “…I know what you mean…  I guess I always have been kinda harsh on Lei…I remember how I yelled at him for not returning that overdue video to Blockbuster on time last week…” He laughed slightly, “It was ‘Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone’, and he thought it was really ‘Harry Potter and the Sorcerer Stoned,’ so he thought it was a different video… He’s just so damn cute sometimes…”

“And I haven’t really ever given Forest enough, well, any space…” Paul spoke.  “I dunno, I just feel like it’s my job to protect him, but Forest is one those free spirited people, so I guess I’ve just been trapping him…”

“Hwoarang…” Jin whispered.  “I guess I’ve always acted like the wife…”

(Speed Bump)

*Everyone squints at Jin.

“No, let me rephrase that… I’ve always treated him well, uh, not as good as I could have…”

“We all feel that way, son,” Kazuya replied, “You know, we’re acting like they are going…to……die…”

(Another Speed Bump)

“Bryan?” Jin asked, “What would you do if Lei died?  Would you kill yourself?”


“Me too…I mean, if Hwoarang did…”

“What, you’re saying you don’t care if Lei dies?”

“I’m not saying that, I’m just saying I’d rather Lei die than Hwoarang.”

“…I’m going to kick your ass!!”

“He has a point, Jin,” Kazuya agreed, “That was rude.”


*Jin’s cell phone starts to ring.


“Here you are, sir,” replied a nurse as she now handed Forest a pair of crutches so he could stop hopping.


All of a sudden, they heard the sound of someone crying outside.  Lee went over to look though the small glass window on one of the double doors.  “OH…Shit!”

“What is it?!” Everyone exclaimed.

“It’s, it’s Xiaoyu, Miharu, Christie, and Eddy!!!”

“What the fuck?!” Hwoarang exclaimed, “Let me see this!” He then walked over to see that Lee had been right.

Forest sighed, “But how did they hear about this?”


“Damn,” Forest replied, “I guess we never thought of that…”

“Crap,” Hwoarang spoke, “Now even more of um’ are showing up…”

They then all looked through to see that Nina, Steve, Jun, Michelle, and Anna had arrived as well.

“Anna?!” Lee exclaimed, “But I saw her die!!”


~Record Scratch~


“Oh well, who cares if you tried to murder Anna?” Hwoarang shrugged.

“Sure,” Lei replied, “You can go out there and murder her here right now, and I won’t arrest you or anything.”

“…Good idea!”

“Hmm,” Hwoarang thought of something… Hey, wasn’t the whole wreck thing Lei’s idea too?


The waiting room was now beginning to completely fill up with Tekken fighters…

At about this time, Julia now exited a nearby room, in a nurse’s outfit… only to see Xiaoyu crying…

Julia ran over to her.  “Ling?  What’s wrong, and why is everyone here like this?”

“Oh Julia!  Haven’t you heard?  Hwoarang, Lee, Forest, and Lei are going to die at any moment!  I heard that Lee’s Honda was torn into scraps, and that Lei and Hwoarang were hurled from the car, and then ran over again, while Lee and Forest were hit by a towing truck!…”

“WHAT?!” Julia exclaimed, “That’s a bunch of crap!  I can’t believe they actually went through with this!”


“Xiao, this is nothing but a big prank.  None of them are hurt, they’re just all waiting back there so they can laugh at everyone for pitying them later on.”


Miharu had been listening too.  “What?!  You mean they’re watching us cry for them right now?!”


“Oooo!!!” Ling growled.  She should have expected this anyway, she also figured it was Hwoarang’s idea.

Just then, Kazuya, Jin, Bryan, and Paul entered the front doors to see everyone.  Jun then ran up to Kazuya…

“I’m so sorry!  I wish I could have done something to prevent this!” She then looked at Jin, “And I know how terrible you must feel, Jin…”

She knows....  Kazuya thought.

At this time, Julia, Xiaoyu, and Miharu all stomped up to them.

“Guys, we need to have a little talk about this…” Julia declared…

The others all arched a brow…


“Ok,” one of the nurses spoke to the ukes who were in one of the back rooms.  “I’m going to go announce your deaths now, so just stay here in the security room to watch,” She then walked off.

“Look guys, there they are,” Lee pointed to the monitor screen.

They then watched as the nurse exited the hallway into the waiting room, as she met the semes up front.

“So, how are they?!” Kazuya asked rather urgently.

“I’m sorry, but they just died…all of them…”


Lee, Lei, Hwoarang, and Forest all now leaned in toward the screen, anticipating the reactions.

“Nah, oh well.” Kazuya shrugged.  “All’s well that’s ends well, that’s my motto, and yes, it ended well.  I’m just sorry I couldn’t see it.  The wreck, I mean.”

“WHAT??!!” Lee exclaimed from the back room, as everyone else looked just as surprised.

Jin also shrugged, “Oh well, you win some, you lose some.  Oh wait, I never lost, it always WAS Hwoarang, so I guess his luck just stayed the same!”

Hwoarang froze on the spot…

“And Lei,” Bryan began, “I must say I’ve been after his job for quite some time now, so I guess I can finally take it, considering he kinda sucked at it.” He declared, “Fwweeezzee!!!” Bryan impersonated, as the whole room began to laugh…

Lei now fell out of his chair…

“Oh, and Forest?” Paul spoke up, “He was just always so weak and pathetic, you know?”

Everyone nodded.

“Yea, and he was just so damn annoying!  Nag nag nag!  Pah, that’s all he ever did!”

Marshal nodded in agreement, “He really was a pathetic son…  I feel so ashamed!!!”

Forest was about to punch in the TV monitor, but Hwoarang grabbed his fist in time to stop him.  “Dude, you’d be electrocuted.” He then turned off the monitors.

The nurse who had announced the ‘death of the ukes’ was now rather, well, freaked.  She now turned to go back to the monitor room.

When she opened the door, she saw that Lei was now loading his gun…


“Very funny you assholes!!!” Kazuya exclaimed as he looked up into one of the cameras in the corner of the room.  “You actually thought you could get away with this??!!  Lee!!  You get out here right this second!!”

Everyone in the room who had been laughing just a second ago, now had their arms folded in a choleric manner for what those four had attempted to pull off in the first place.

The nurse then walked back out.

“So,” Kazuya began, “Where are they?!”

“Um, well…”

“Come on, we won’t kill them, yet.” Paul sighed.

“Well, actually, they were all crying…  The Chinese guy with the red hair was about to put a gun to his head I think…”


(Zipper Sound)


“WHAT??!!” Everyone exclaimed in unison, as Jin now began to strangle the nurse.

“Where are they damnit?!”

“*cough* Go straight down that hall and turn right *cough* it’s the first room.”

Jin then threw the nurse, who screamed as she flew back and hit the coke machine.

Jin then yelled back as he began to sprint, “AND HE’S NOT CHINESE DAMNIT!!”

Jin sprinted down the halls, followed by Kazuya, Bryan, and Paul.  When he reached the opened door, Jin looked in to see…

“Good bye, cruel world…” Hwoarang whispered as he was about to pull the trigger…

“And hurry up with my gun,” Lei replied, “We want our turns as well…”

“NNNOOOO!!!!” Jin exclaimed as he attempted to do a dramatic dive, but Lee slammed the door shut and locked it as Jin hit the door… He tried to break it in, but it was a security room, so it was just too thick…


“Well, now it’s my turn…” Everyone heard Lei declare from the inside.

Bryan then began beating on the door.  “NO!! LEI!!!  DON’T DO IT PLEASE DON’T!!!”


“My turn.” Lee sighed, “Now I’ll just get this over with.  OH KAZUYA WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A DICK??!!”


“NNOOO!!!  LEE!!!”

“And I guess I’m last, but PATHETIC people go last!”



Suddenly, the door in front of them opened…

“So, how are you feeling boys?” Lee asked.

“TERRIBLE!!” Kazuya exclaimed, “YOU JUST KILLED YOUR—WHAT??!!!”

The door then opened fully to reveal everyone inside of the room, laughing their asses off!


Julia then strolled up.  “True, what they were pulling on you was a dirty trick, but what you guys did wasn’t too nice either,” She giggled.

“DAMNIT!!!” Kazuya exclaimed trying to stop the tears from running down his face…

“Hmm, Jin.  Looks like I didn’t LOSE this time, huh?” Hwoarang glared at him.

Jin stood up from where he had sunk down to his knees.  “*sniff*  Why did you have to do that tell me why the fuck did you have to do that??!!!”

“Why do you care?” Julia asked.  “Hey…wait a minute…  Jin, why are you crying if you hate Hwoarang?  And Bryan, why are you crying if you hate Lei? And Kazuya, why are you crying if you hate Lee, and Paul, why are you crying if you, if you, well why are you crying?!”

“SHUT UP JULIA!!” Everyone exclaimed.


“And go away why you’re at it,” Jin sighed.


Julia then turned around and exited the hall.

Bryan then went straight over to Lei and snatched the gun right off of his belt.  “You’re NOT carrying this around any more, EVER!!”

“…Oh yea?” Lei smirked, right before pushing Bryan straight back against the neighbouring wall with the flats of his palms and kissing him deeply.

“Go Lei!!” Hwoarang exclaimed, “Wait a’ be dominant!!”

Forest did the same thing to Paul that Lei had to Bryan a split second later.

“…Fine Lee,” Kazuya sighed, “Just do it already.” Does this mean I’m the uke now???

“Don’t mind if I do.”

“A-hem!” Jin looked at Hwoarang.

“I don’t know Jin, I’m still pretty mad at you…”

“…But, but you’re the one who—.”

(Gets cut off after Hwoarang threw him down on the floor and began kissing him)

Lee then turned around as he still held Kazuya back against the wall.  “Guys, I think the hospital isn’t the best place for this…  Come on Kazuya!!”

“Yes sir…” Damnit!

Forest then spoke up.  “And now a shout out for the Chinese Quest for Dominance!!”

“….Hey,” Hwoarang began, “I’m NO—ah the hell with it!  Come on Jin,” he then leaned in to whisper into Jin’s ear, “Looks like Hwoarang the horny ghost is back.”

“See you later guys,” Lei winked, “And you comeon too, Bryan.”

“…I really do love the way you say ‘comeon’…”


The Next Day……



“Hello?” Kazuya sighed into the phone after a long night.  “Oh, hi Jin.  What do you mean ‘how was it’?!!


Thus, the ukes had regained some dominance, though; they were STILL ukes none the less.

Return to Archive | next | previous