Disclaimer: Characters belong to Square Soft. This fic is not for profit.

::attempts group hug on all kind reviewers:: Thank you!

Yaoi alert! Next chapter, back to the plot, such as it is.


Chapter Eight

By Race Ulfson

I spent the night surrounded by Seifer.

I tried to convince him that I could take more, that I could give as well as receive. Seifer had other ideas. He pulled me to him, wrapped his arms around me, fell asleep. I followed soon after. For the first time in a long while I slept without drugs and without nightmares.

I spent the day surrounded by Seifer.

I snuggled on his couch in the blankets he'd been using while I had his bed. I wore an old pair of his sweats that had shrunk almost enough to fit me. I had washed with Seifer's soap and shampoo. His scent and things gave me a feeling of security as I dozed. It helped keep the nightmares and depression away.

It also made me horny.

I was tempted to call Seifer. I stopped myself when I remembered Rinoa's irritating clingy phone calls.

I was not tempted to call the Garden. I was still on vacation.

Seifer had warned me that he would not call. He said he didn't want to wake me up. He was still babying me, and he had made me promise to stay in the nest on the couch and sleep as much as I could.

I agreed, thinking that sleeping all day boded well for the night.

Seifer's shift ended at 1830. I decided to wait for Seifer in the foyer and see if I could get him to fuck me right there. By 1845 I was ready to start rubbing myself on the furniture. By 1910 my legs couldn't take standing anymore. I had to limp back to the couch.

1930 I was telling myself logical reasons why it would take an hour to get home.

1940 I decided that waiting would be more tolerable if I had something to drink. I searched Seifer's kitchen but all I found was some import beer in the back of the fridge.

I was on my third when Seifer finally arrived, his arms full of groceries.

I was angry he had such a normal reason to be late.

I was relieved that he hadn't really abandoned me.

I was frustrated sexually after thinking about him all day.

I was exhausted from standing too long.

I was embarrassed that he caught me sneaking his beer.

All those thoughts and emotions swirled around in side my head. The kitchen swirled around my eyes. Seifer dropped the grocery bags and caught me before I hit the floor.

Instead of my legs around Seifer, it was his arms around me.

Good enough.

Seifer told me I was stressed out. He said that I had over done it like he had told me not to. He tucked me back in bed.

I don't remember falling asleep but I woke up to hot, bloodrare steak. It was perfect. Seifer grinned at me and popped a piece in my mouth before I was fully coherent.

I hitched myself up on the pillows and let him feed me. Succulent slivers of porterhouse, molten forkfulls of buttery potato, crunchy bites of salad and sips of a surprisingly good merlot. I made no effort to take the plate or utensils from Seifer and he didn't offer.

His fingers brushed my face a few times. I touched his arm, wrapped my hand over his to steady the glass when he gave the the wine. He leaned over licked the inside of my wrist so quickly I wasn't entirely sure it had happened.

Seifer abandoned the fork and fed me bits of salad with his fingers. I licked the dressing off his fingers and began to suckle them, not intending to let him go. He grinned wickedly and put a piece of steak in my mouth with his lips. I swallowed quickly, eager to get a better taste of him.

He pulled away, disappointing me. Seifer dropped the now largely empty tray on the floor by the bed. He finished off the wine and turned back to give me another kiss. When his tongue encouraged me to part my lips, Seifer let some of the dry plummy wine he'd been holding in his mouth flow into mine.

While I savored the merlot and the kiss, Seifer moved back to my wrist, suckling my pulse, and he followed it up the inside of my arm, then over to my throat, gentle, nibbling kisses. He gathered me to him, once again kissing my lips.

I used to hate it when Seifer made me feel small. Now I was glad I fit into his arms, protected by his body over mine. Safe. Safe and wanted.

The kisses changed from gentle to frantic. Heat rolled off Seifer as he hardened under my hand. I responded to his need, trying not to think.

If this was a good idea or not. If it was going to last this time or be one more failure for me.

Seifer tore me out of those baggy sweats, throwing the shirt across the room. I shivered when the cold air hit me, but Seifer was all over me, kissing, touching, stroking like he couldn't get enough.

I couldn't get enough.

I wrapped myself around him, burrowing my hands under his shirt, down his pants. I wanted skin. Seifer was wearing entirely too many clothes. He must have agreed with me becasue he pulled away with a growl and kicked off his boots. I got his shirt off him, a little worse for wear, while Seifer removed his pants. Then he was back in my arms, radiating heat and lust.

I pressed myself against him, pulling him back on top of me, hooking my legs around his.

"Seifer", I said, ready to beg if necessary.

I arched my back and rubbed myself against his hardness.

He rumbled a chuckle against my hair. "I was gonna try to warm you up a little first."

Seifer fumbled around on the side table, alternating kisses with curses, until he found the vial he was seeking. He got the lid off, using his teeth, before I took pity on him and took it away from him.

I poured the sweet scented gel liberally into my hands and rubbed them together to warm it up. I reached down for Seifer, and starting with his scrotum, lovingly worked my way up his thick shaft.

Seifer took some of the warmed gel off my hands and did the same to me, in the reverse. He teased his way past my sensitive glans and stroked down my cock. He cupped my balls, fondling them, and then slid to my opening. I bucked my hips up to him, trying not come with only his finger in me this time.

"You ready?"

"What do you think?", I growled. I almost bit him, but I remembered the night before. If Seifer had quit then, I would have died. Or killed him. Or both. I thrust up at him, demanding attention that he finally gave.

Seifer kissed the insides of my thighs, my balls, my cock, and then he lifted my ass up in his hands and gently pulled me onto him. Once he was sure that I could take him and he wasn't hurting me, he moved his hands up to support my back, pulling me to him. He kissed me, sliding his tongue in my mouth in time with his thrusts. Too soon he hit my sweet spot and I was galvanized, not breathing, clutching Seifer so hard I know I left marks.

Time stopped.

When it started again I crashed over the edge and fell for a thousand years.


Seifer held me down and growling deep in his throat, came inside of me.

It was just the way I like it, fast and a little rough. Afterwards Seifer held me and kissed me not like he was starving but as if he wanted each kiss to last forever.

I lay there in his arms, listening to his breathing and his heart beat, surrounded and protected by his warmth, and I was terrified.

Shiva had reminded me of something she was supposed to help me forget.

I loved him.

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