Author's Notes: Ok, I know it may seem like I’ve been on a bit of hiatus for a while, but I’ve really been working on four new slash fics, along with my ‘A New Beginning’ one as well. I’ve discovered that it’s much easier to get several chapters written and then post one, then it is to post a chapter and not have a very good idea on what the next one exactly is to be about. Well, it’s easier for me at least. And now on with my dumb fic!
DISCLAIMER: No, I don't own any of the characters....
Where Did All the Guys Go?
Chapter 5 - ‘The Chinese Quest for Dominance!’ Er, and Korean…
Thus Lee, Hwoarang, Lei, and Forest and set forth to plan how to pursue their dominance…But…meanwhile, Kazuya, Jin, Bryan, and Paul had decided to have a little meeting of their own over this…
Kazuya was waiting at his mansion for the others to arrive. Basically what had happened, was all of the ‘semes’ had found out that something was going on one way or another… First of all, Kazuya had made a phone call to Lei Wulong, and ended up talking to Bryan Fury instead, who had filled him in on what he had just witnessed. Then, Kazuya had received a rather urgent and disturbing call from his son Jin, who basically had the idea that Hwoarang and Lee had runaway together. Hearing this gave Kazuya the urge to crack the phone in half, or moreover to just break something, but if this had been true, then what role could Forest and Lei possibly play in this?
“Oh my god……what if they are…ALL……nah!”
Kazuya excluded this as a possibility right away… Well, after Bryan and Jin had filled him in on the apparent situation, Kazuya had made a phone call to Paul Phoenix, who had just spoken to Marshal Law one minute earlier… Paul was relieved to know Forest was alright, and once Kazuya had finally convinced him that Lee did NOT kidnap Forest, he had decided that something was definitely up here.
Kazuya had been endlessly pacing back and fourth in the enormous den for a while, until he suddenly heard the doorbell ring. He then began walking over to answer it, but not before pausing briefly in front of the decorative mirror to straighten out his favourite purple suit. He loved that suit…
Kazuya then continued over to the doors. It took him a second to find all of the chains, since he was used to, well, actually Lee answering the door. They didn’t have a butler as someone would expect, though they hired servants to do things temporarily, but it would be obvious that Kazuya wouldn’t want anyone else to reside in his household for apparent reasons. He now opened the door, to see none other than his son Jin Kazama.
“Hel—.”
“NO!!! Dad!! Wha-what am I going to do?! Wha—.”
“ALRIGHT!! Don’t worry, we ARE going to figure this out one way or another,” Kazuya assured.
Jin then went over to take a seat on the couch, as he continuously sighed to himself. “I-I just don’t get it… Tell me! What does Lee have that I don’t?!”
“Hmm, well, he is much more exquisite, cunning, feminine, decorous, delicate, intel—.”
“OK!!! I get the picture…”
Kazuya sighed at the sight of this, “Don’t even think about it, Jin. I KNOW that Lee and Hwoarang are NOT, well, uh, you know they’re NOT, uh—.”
“Fucking!!!”
(Zipper Sound)
“………You actually know that word?……”
“……Well, it, it was taking you so long to think of it!!”
“……Right…”
Just then, the doorbell rang yet again. Kazuya now walked toward the door once more, as he glanced back at Jin over his shoulder one last time. He was definitely on the verge of sanity loss… The doorbell then rang again, and again.
*Ring Ring Ring Ring Ring!!!*
“OK!! I HEAR YOU!!”
Kazuya now opened the door to see Bryan Fury, who stomped right in.
“Ok, I don’t know what the hell’s going on here, but I’m going to find out!” Bryan assured. He then looked over at Jin who was still seated on the couch. He was talking to himself while making various motions with his hands…
“Uh, Kazuya? Is your son…ok?...”
“No.”
“That’s what I thought.”
The doorbell then rang again; however, before Kazuya could even answer it, the door flew right open and hit him in the face, as Paul now stepped inside. Paul then looked around. “Where’s Kazuya?” Bryan then gestured to the door as Kazuya flung it forward, as it now hit Paul.
“Why you…”
“Stop right there Phoenix!”
Paul cracked his knuckles before taking a step closer.
“STOP IT!!!” Jin yelled from a few yards away on the couch. “This is NOT the time to kick each other’s asses!”
Paul then sighed. “Fine, sorry Kazuya.”
“Apology accepted.” He then muttered as he walked away, “I’ll just kick your ass later.”
Paul looked up, “Hey…did you just—.”
“Ok then!!” Kazuya spoke up as everyone now took a seat on the couch, other than himself as he now paced in front of everyone.
“So, what have we all noticed today?” Kazuya asked everyone.
“That Hwoarang loves Lee!!!”
*Everyone looks at Jin.
“Um, not really…” Kazuya sighed. “What I mean to say is, well, ok. Paul?”
“Yea?”
“Do you consider yourself to be the ‘dominant’ one over Forest?”
Paul cringed at the question. “Is that really any of your business?”
Kazuya sighed again, “Ok, I’ll admit that I ‘am’ the dominant one over Lee.”
“Duh,” Everyone simultaneously replied.
“Fine,” Paul spoke up, “Yes, I am the dominant one over Forest, I suppose.”
“You’re the seme,” Jin stated.
Kazuya then looked at Jin. “And where are you learning all of this new vocabulary? The net?”
“I’m 21.”
“Oh yea. I keep forgetting that,” Kazuya muttered those last four words. “Well, moving on. Bryan, do you consider yourself to be dominate/seme/koi/on top/whatever?”
“Maybe…”
Jin then cocked his head to the side. “You mean then Lei is really the—?”
“Of course not!!” Bryan cut him off.
“Ah ha!” Kazuya pointed out, “That’s what I thought.” He then turned to face Jin. “And Jin, are you the dominant one?”
Jin blushed. “Do I have to answer that?…”
“Yes.”
“Well, er, ‘sometimes’…” Jin blushed even harder.
Looks like Lee was right on the 50-50.... “Its ok son, Lee already suggested this.” Shit, I so shouldn’t have said that....
“WHAT?! But-but how would HE know?!!” Jin frantically spoke as he clenched his fist…
“Hmm.” Bryan thought to himself. If Lee and Hwoarang really ARE together now, then that means that ‘MY’ Lei and Forest could.... could....
“Hmm.” Paul thought to himself. If Lee and Hwoarang are together now, then this means Forest and.... Lei could.... could....
Kazuya now looked back and fourth between Jin, Bryan, and Paul. “Snap out of it! It’s NOT what you are thinking! What we have here is a rebellion!”
“A Chinese rebellion?” Paul arched a brow.
“I guess you really could say that,” Kazuya nodded.
“But I haven’t done anything to make Forest mad at me?!” Paul declared.
“Are you sure?” Kazuya asked.
“Well…”
“Forest!! Put down that cabinet!!”
“Forest, take your afternoon nap!!”
“Are you sure a wheelchair wouldn’t be best?”
“No going out after dark, there’s rapist out there!! They’re everywhere!!”
“Yes, I ‘do’ own you!!”
“I guess I have…”
“And what about you, Mr. Fury?” Kazuya asked.
“Let’s see…”
“I OWN you!”
“Don’t come cry’n to me when you get shot!”
“I OWN you!”
“You’re not cut out to be a policeman anymore damnit!”
“I OWN you!”
“No, no! I see you trying to hide that cut on your torso down there! Let me see that right now!! Hell Lei!! Look at the size of that!! Are you asking to die?! I don’t care if you were ‘on the job’ or not!!!
“I OWN you!”
*WHAP!!* K.O....
“Nope, can’t think of a thing.”
*Everyone looks at Bryan.
Bryan then looked around at everyone. “What?…”
Kazuya sighed for the billionth time, “Bryan, this is serious.”
“…Fine! It is true then! He-he has every right in the world to mad at me… But I have the right to—.”
“OK! Jin?”
“Well…”
“This is ‘healthier’ for you.”
“No Julia, Hwoarang uh, ‘can’t’ come to the phone right now. No! Uh, that’s NOT him in the background. I don’t know where he lives!! What? You want to ask him on a....date? NO! Uh, he already has a bo-girlfriend!!”
“So what if I did empty the gas tank to your motorcycle? We have a car!! It is NOT a piece o’ crap! Well, maybe. But that motorcycle is dangerous! And hell, you don’t even wear a helmet you’re going to get yourself killed and then where will you be?!”
“You’re going to wear THAT?! I don’t think so!”
“You were on top last time so now I’m going to—.”
“Um, kinda…” Jin sighed as he ran a hand back through his ebony bangs.
“And how about you? Mr. ‘big and bad’?” Bryan demanded.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Kazuya assured, “I never, oh…”
“You belong to me Chaolan!”
“I don’t want you out in the sun too much, I like your skin pale the way it is!!”
“NO SMOKING!!!”
“Nina left a message on our answering machine today, are you up to something? Don’t you try to lie to me! You say you’re not lying, but how do I know to believe you? Trust you? I don’t trust anyone!!”
“Ha! Me…uke?…right… The day you get to—.”
“OK!! I’ve been bad too!” Kazuya admitted.
“Hey…I just remembered something…” Jin muttered. “Hwoarang’s not Chinese!!”
“…………”
“Hmm…” Kazuya thought. So that’s why Jin is the uke every once in a while....
……Meanwhile, the ukes were now having their meeting at Marshal Law’s house. Marshal was in court, so they had awhile.
“Ok everyone!” Lee declared. “This is meeting. A meeting to regain our dominance! Yes, the Chinese quest for dominance!”
“Damn straight!” Hwoarang assured.
Lee nodded. “We’re going to teach them that we own them as much as they think they own us!”
“That’s right!” Hwoarang agreed, “But hey… I’m NOT Chinese!”
(No one seems to hear him)
“We have to show them,” Lee once more declared, “We must stop being so venal, especially when they are all having an irascibility problem, as well as being so flippant, and oppressive!! We deserve an explication for our apparent devaluation by showing them all what lamentation feels like! Trust me, they are malleable!!”
*Everyone has the WTF look.
“…What the hell did you just say?!” Hwoarang questioned, followed by a sarcastic nod from Forest as well.
“He’s saying that we need to stop being wimpy while showing them what it feels like to experience grief, because their opinions can be changed,” Lei replied.
“Exactly!” Lee applauded.
“Woa…” Hwoarang squinted, “You actually understood that?!”
Lei shrugged.
“Hey,” Forest spoke up, “I-I understood everything too!”
“Right…” Lee sighed, “Moving on, we must now implement our goals, while being as adroit as—.”
“LEE!!!”
“Yes Hwoarang?”
“Use ‘basic’ speech please!!!”
“…huh?…”
Lei shook his head, “He was saying we should now achieve our goals in a skilful manner, or dexterous, clever, expe—.”
“Shut the hell up, Lei,” Hwoarang sighed.
Dumb kids...
Dumb cops!...
I don’t know crap, but they don’t have to know that! “Uh yea…” Forest nodded, “Continue.”
“As I was saying,” Lee went on, “Well, actually, Lei pretty much said it for me…but anyway, we must now formulate a plan!”
“Formulate…” Hwoarang thought. “Oh yeah, ‘come-up-with!’ See, I’m smart!!”
“………”
“………”
“………”
“…You guys suck!…”
*Everyone laughs
“Yea, I know I’m funny.” Hwoarang rolled his eyes. And cooler! Heh heh.
“Yes, trust me guys,” Lee declared, “NO one is more possessive than Kazuya.”
“Pah!” Hwoarang spat, “Have you seen Jin in a club?! Or around Julia?”
“No way,” Lei shook his head, “None of you have it as bad as I do!”
“Screw that!” Forest protested, “I bet none of you have been locked inside the house ‘for fear of rapist!”
“Well Paul’s eyes don’t glow red on ya!” Hwoarang declared.
“Hey,” Lee replied, “Kazuya’s more of a devil than Jin!”
“Oh yeah?!” Lei spoke up, “You finally think you’re going to get them for a change, let them have ‘their’ turn as the ‘uke’ for once, then at night, you think they’re not awake, so you creep up on them while they’re asleep, finally, you’re almost there, but they just end up pulling you down instead at the last minute!!”
(~Record Scratch~)
“………”
“………”
“………”
“……Please tell me I didn’t just say that…”
“It’s ok, Lei,” Lee assured, “We all feel your pain.”
“You couldn’t possibly……”
“Moving on,” Lee began, “Any ideas?”
“Well,” Forest began,” You implied a second ago that we should make them feel grief for what they have done to us, so how would we do that?”
“Duh!” Hwoarang replied, “Commit suicide, of course.”
“……True, that would work,” Lee agreed, “But, I think there are…better alternatives…”
“Hmm,” Lei thought for a moment,” Maybe we could just make them ‘think’ we died, or something.”
“I don’t know about that,” Forest stated, “How do we know none of them would do something drastic then?”
“Forest is right,” Lee declared, “If any of us died, they may become despondent and commit suicide themselves, or just do something plain…crazy, and that would defeat the whole purpose of this in the first place. And besides, I think when we refer back to the stupid ‘uke’ issue, well, I think our guys are just feeling trepidation…”
Hwoarang was about to say something, before Lei cut him off.
“He means ‘fearful.’”
“Hey, I knew that!”
“Sorry,” Lei replied, “I’m just trying to elucidate.”
Elucidate?! Damn! “Whatever.”
“Just remember,” Lee began, “High success is our goal, not mediocrity!”
“That’s it,” Hwoarang stood up, “If I hear just ONE more word from you, that has more than three syllables, then I’m going to—.”
“OK!”
“Oh, and by the way,” Lei responded, “The word ‘mediocrity’ is a root for the word ‘mediocre’ or ‘average’.”
“SHUT UP!!!!!”
*Everyone looks at Forest…
“…This is getting us no where!!
“This meeting has way too much incongruity!!” Hwoarang declared.
*Everyone looks at Hwoarang…
“What?? Well, about the grief issue, what if we were to just make them think something happened to us. Not death obviously, but perhaps just critical, or something…I dunno…”
“…Wait a second,” Lee replied, “That’s a very good suggestion Hwoarang!”
“Hmm…” Lei thought for a moment… “Hey, I have an idea!”
“Fine then,” Bryan sighed, “We know why they are mad at us, but then what are they up to?”
“I guess they’re having some kind of ‘Chinese quest for dominance meeting,” Kazuya replied. “I guess we really don’t deserve much vindication here, huh?”
“Huh?” Jin squinted.
“He means ‘clear from blame’, or from criticism, or just ‘not guilty,” Bryan shrugged.
“You understood that?” Jin asked.
“Yea, I’ve been to court.”
“Well,” Kazuya continued, “We obviously can’t just be impervious here?!”
“I think it’s obvious that we’re not, Kazuya.” Bryan sighed.
I don’t understand shit, but none of them have to know that.... “Yea,” Paul nodded, “I agree!”
*Everyone looks at Paul.
“Well I do?!”
“Hey…” Jin muttered, “Hwoarang is not Chinese!”
“Oh yea,” Kazuya thought for a second, “It took you that long to think of this?”
*Paul and Bryan laugh…
“………no!……”
*~*Telephone Rings*~*
“I’ll get it, I bet it’s Lee calling to apologize,” Kazuya sighed.
“Good!” Paul replied, “Then Forest can get his regular pointless speech without a definite meaning from me!”
*Ring* *Ring*
“Hello? Yes, this is he. Who is this? Huh? Where are you calling from?!”
“I hope it is them,” Jin sighed, “I’m going to admit that I am a ‘little’ worried…”
“WHAT??!!”
Everyone now turned around on the couch to look back at Kazuya who was obviously in pure shock…
“Yes…I…I see…thank you……”
Kazuya then hung up the phone…well, dropped it……
“What was that about?!” Jin questioned, “What’s wrong?”
“Lee…Forest…Lei…Hwoarang…they…they…”
“WHAT IS IT?!!” Paul demanded.
“…Th-they were in a wreck……and are in critical condition down at the hospital……”