Author's Notes: Gah! *sob * I cried while I wrote this too! I need to stop writing depressing scenes! ;_; That or quit playing Aeris’s Orchestrated Theme Song while I’m writing. ;_; Oh, yes, reviews that are related to what happens in the end of this chapter would be greatly appreciated. :D
The Chronicles of Obsession: Desire
Chapter 5 - Dream
After some over-the-phone intimidation, Ling had finally gotten her flight plans arranged to her approval. Of course, as a result, she ended using half of her spending limit on her credit card. Well, at least she had good credit. The antsy girl glanced across the room, making sure she was ready to leave immediately. She only had three hours before her flight and she knew she would be spending a good hour just trying to get the airport. Her eyes skimmed across the room, double-checking everything as she marked off the list in her head. She was nearly finished… until she laid eyes on her bookshelf.
For a while, stillness reign the air as she stared blankly at the photo albums scattered along the shelf. Ling allowed some time to pass, giving herself a moment to relax before she cautiously walked over. Among that shelf was one lone photo black album, separated by empty space from the others. A hesitant hand crept towards the album, drawing back now and then as doubts began to grow until the girl finally ripped the book into her hands. A hand gripped the album at the bottom while the other was clasped firmly over it as if the book itself would try to fly open.
Her teeth pressed against each other, grinding while her eyes remained locked on the cover of the dark album. A tense sigh slipped passed her teeth as her nails etched into the ebony vinyl. In a few moments, Ling found herself embracing the photo book tightly against her chest, leaning slightly from feeling the weight of her heart.
“Jinny-sama…”
Ling stood in the doorway of Hwoarang’s room, wearing her school uniform and the backpack hanging by her side. The shades were drawn, leaving nothing but darkness and shadows in the room. It was impossible to tell that dawn had come. At this time, Ling would have been in her advising class, starting at a bright 7:20 in the morning. But instead she was here. This was the last place where she could feel some sort of peace. Her mind had lost all train of thought and that was when her body took over. Without a conscious thought, she dragged herself across the city in a haze, stumbling closer to something that seemed sane in this insane world. And this is where she ended up, in the doorway of her only remaining friend’s room.
Light swept through the abyss of the room, slithering its way to the sleeping body that laid nested in blankets. The body shuffled against the sheets as the warmth of the sun continued to nuzzle him to awake until Hwoarang finally emerged from his sleep. He groaned tiredly while his arms pushed himself up, hiding him from the light in the silhouette of Ling. Hwoarang’s eyes strained as it tried to adjust to the sudden brightness, but in the end, he had to cover his eyes with his forearm. Once his eyes were protected from the ravaging light, he slowly came to recognize the shadow in the glow of the sun.
“Ling…” He uttered with an exhausted moan, “Is that you?” Ling just stared blankly at her shadow as Hwoarang’s words disappeared once it entered her mind.
“He was there again today.” Ling said weakly, her hand clenching around the handle of her bag. Her thoughts still remained in the encounter she had with Jin that early morning.
“I tried to talk to him again…” She said softly as images of Jin flashed vividly through her thoughts like static, layered pictures. Her eyes grew dark the moment the scene replayed in her mind.
“But… he wouldn’t listen.” Hwoarang stared quietly for a while before he let out a tender sigh and closed his eyes, he wasn’t sure what to say. It was hard for him to accept the reality of the situation and he knew Ling couldn’t deal with it either. That was why he had been ignoring and pretending to move on with his life; drinking, getting into fights, going back to his old self. But… she wasn’t able to do that, she wouldn’t. She wanted to live in the past and sometimes, he felt like slapping some sense into her. Yet, he couldn’t do that… because the truth was he wanted to do the same. Whenever he looked at Ling, he saw a mirror of himself, the person who believed there was still a chance. But now, he could see that spirit dying before his eyes as he watched Ling’s fingers began to slip from the bag. A thud echoed in the room the second it collapsed to the ground.
“I don’t want to go to school anymore…” Ling decided as a single tear glided down her cheek. Her hands drifted over her chest, embracing herself tightly as she began to hide from the world.
“I don’t want to do anything anymore…” Her nails started piercing into her skin with memory that turned on her, she had reached her limit. She couldn’t take it anymore. Her hands began to shake, her legs felt like delicate glass as she fought fiercely against the violent sobs that were to come. Just as she was on the verge of breaking down, she heard a faint voice calling her.
“Ling…” The soft voice whispered faintly. The broken girl glanced up at the voice, her face covered in tears to see Hwoarang gently holding his hand out. She stared a few moments at the welcoming hand as she stumbled a few steps closer. Her eyes shifted to her friend, gazing weakly into his soft amber eyes. She stopped at the foot of the bed and slowly reached out for his hand, but quickly drew back a hand’s distance away, glancing up once more with pleading eyes. Hwoarang replied with nod and closed his eyes as he hold out his hand closer to her. Ling’s attention turned to the outreach palm once she was giving an answer and delicately placed her hand on his. The moment she felt his hand grip warmly around her, she threw herself around him in a tight embrace, knocking them into the pile of blankets. Hwoarang lightly placed his arms around her and sighed softly against her neck as she sobbed against his shoulder.
As time slowly passed, Hwoarang found himself caressing the gentle curve of her back, losing himself in her embrace as he breathed softly on her hair. For some strange reason, it made his heart pound stronger than before. He began to feel alive once again, breaking free of the mindless zombie he had become. Ling could sense something different as well. The world didn’t seem as painful when she was in his arms and she could actually feel the hole in heart disappear. But there was one thing that couldn’t comfort Ling no matter how close she was to Hwoarang… and that was her own guilt.
“I’m sorry…” Ling cried as she buried her head into his chest, gripping his shoulders lightly. Hwoarang grew a concerned face and gently rested his head against hers.
“Why?” He asked softly, lacing his fingers loosely together around her waist. He nuzzled into her hair, inhaling her sweet, tender scent.
“You must hate me… for bringing Jin into your life.” She sobbed quietly, hiding her face as she tried to hold back her tears. Hwoarang’s eyes flipped open at her response and quickly pulled her up to face him.
“Don’t say that…” He said softly as he placed his hands on her smooth cheeks, staring deep into her crying eyes. His thumb lightly brushed away her tears as his fingers carefully brushed along the curve of her skin. He waited patiently while she sniffed her sobs away and then ran his fingers through her hair, pulling closer to him until their foreheads touched. He gazed into her sadden eyes and sighed quietly.
“Ling… I don’t hate you for meeting Jin… and I don’t blame you for anything that has caused this to happen…” Ling sniffed another silent sob and finally opened her eyes to meet his gaze as she placed a shaking hand over his. She looked into the soul of his eyes and watched it began to wash away from the tears that welled up in his eyes. The sight of his wounded soul stabbed deep into her heart and she nearly winced as the tear fell from his face.
“He left us both...” Hwoarang said as his voice cracked to finish those words. Ling gripped his hand fiercely, feeling her heart crying out in agony. She couldn’t bare the look on Hwoarang and she tried to wipe away his tears… but she could only cry as she felt her own tears stroked against his face. Hwoarang felt the pain with every beat of his heart, he could his heart collapsing as he watched Ling cry. He couldn’t stand to see another person he loved in pain and in an instant, his lips met with hers. He lost himself in a deep, passionate kiss, feeling the softness of her lips and the hot breath that escaped between them. The two of them gasped for air after they had tasted each other’s skin and collapsed against the bed, holding each other tightly, caressing each other in the dark… trying to defeat their grief by listening to the cries of their hearts and the emotions that overcame their bodies.