Hemoglobin
Chapter Seventeen
Hemoglobin
Chapter Seventeen
I groaned, my head pounding. In my soupy state, I reached up, massaging the back of my head. It hurt, and I couldn’t remember what had happened, why it hurt so much. I sat up, my eyes still closed. I didn’t really want to open my eyes, because I was almost afraid of finding something. I groaned loudly when I did open my eyes. My vision was all blurry.
"What happened?" I asked myself. I was sitting alone in a room with white, white walls, and I was alone. And the walls were so white. I looked down, feeling velvet under my bare palm. I was curled up on a velvet loveseat, it’s red fabric standing out garishly against the pale walls. I looked around further as my vision cleared. There were a few crosses on the wall, which made me realize that I was still in the church. I looked around, whipping my head on my neck. The windows were impressive images of the Virgin Mary, and various Saints that I didn’t know anything about, all carved lovingly into the rosy stained glass. When my eyes rested on the windows, I paused. They looked familiar, too familiar.
"Fuck," I mumbled, trying to stand. I felt wobbly on my feet, but at least I didn’t fall over. I looked around some more, wanting desperately to know why this room seemed to familiar. I closed my eyes, feeling cool. It was the same feeling I always got when the crosses on my coat reacted with the presence of a vampire. I looked down at my arms. I was still wearing the coat, and the small red crosses were glowing softly, looking purple through the blue haze. There were also a few crosses tacked onto the snowy walls, glowing, just as my arms were. I racked my brain, trying to figure out where this scene had taken place before. I got a flash of the cross sword, blood dripping from Seifer's wounded body.
"Oh, God….." I trailed off, appropriately, seeing as how I was in a church. I went towards the door, hearing voices on the other side. I knew one of them was Esemono. Esemono….. The last thing I remembered was talking to him, and then it all went black. I wondered if he knocked me out. But why? What was going on?
Squall…..
I gasped. "Seifer?" I whispered.
You can hear me…..?
"Yes…" I kept my answers to a whisper, not wanting Esemono to come back. "Where are you? Why can I hear you?"
I…..don’t know, La Mer. Please…. Help me.
I sighed noisily. I couldn’t believe that a dream I had had over five years ago was coming back to haunt me. "Seifer?" I called quietly.
La Mer, I know….you don’t…… care, but… I need you…. Please……
I sobbed silently. His voice sounded so small, like a child. He though I didn’t care? That thought alone hurt me more than anything Seifer could ever do in the name of bloodlust. I went to the door, listening. It was quiet. I slowly opened it, poking my head into the hallway. I had to snap my mouth shut to prevent me from gagging. There was a horrible feeling in the air, and I could smell blood, and something else……
I slowly walked down the darkened hall, not wanting to make any unnecessary noise. I had to brace myself with the wall a couple of times, the smell and the dark hanging in the air debilitating me. The thickness in the atmosphere made my chest hurt, and the sweet tinge of blood made my throat constrict. Was I actually craving it? I completely stopped moving when I heard a low moan of agony, and a hushed voice. There was no doubt that the moan was Seifer. I couldn’t really make out the other voice, though. I then heard footsteps, and a door closing.
I’m sorry……. La Mer. I did…..love you….
I cried out quietly, pushing forward as best I could. My heart began to beat rapidly. Seifer must have sensed that he was going to die…. Again. And this thought filled me with the most tangible dread I had ever felt in my life. I tried to break into a run, but a wave of nausea hit me. The stench of burning flesh was burning the inside of my nostrils.
"Seifer!?" I whispered hoarsely.
He didn’t answer.
When I reached the closed door at the end of the hallway, I leaned against it, using the metal doorknockers to support my swaying body. I had no idea what I was going to stumble in on, but I didn’t care. All I knew was Seifer, all I felt was Seifer. I turned the heavy knobs, throwing my weight into the thick wood. I fell to my knees, coughing as everything hit me like a train. It was staggering, and I would have blacked out if I wasn’t so determined…. I looked down at my hands, which were splayed on the red carpet. The fabric between my fingers was a deep royal purple, and my hands were bathed in blue light. I could feel my arms glowing gently, almost pulsing. Tears sprung to my eyes even before I looked up, because I knew what I was going to find.
I let out a loud, low moan as the vision from my old dream became reality. Seifer was impaled on a cross at the end of the long carpeted path, his head bowed in defeat. I got off my knees, running clumsily towards my lover. I fell on more than one occasion, the heavy feeling in my chest causing me to wheeze as I tried to breathe. I stopped, looking up at the cross, stunned. At this proximity, the brightness from its blue glow was practically blinding me. I squinted my eyes, looking up more. It was definitely the cross sword, and it hadn’t been here before, so I knew that it had been made specifically for this purpose.
"Seifer?!" I cried, climbing up on the altar. All my confusion was gone, and all I knew was that I had to get him out of here before he died, left me again.
Seifer didn’t respond, but I could tell that he was still alive, or as alive as he could be. His chest was heaving gently as he shallowly struggled for breath. He was nailed to the cross in typical Stigmata fashion, the wounds in his palms slowly dripping almost black blood onto the wood of the altar. The dripping sound was deafening, echoing throughout the large room. My lips actually parted in what felt like hunger. When I got my balance on my perch, I stood to full height, which brought me face to face with my dying lover.
"Seifer?" I whispered, touching the side of his face, tracing down to his parted lips. His fangs were fully out, and looked long and deadly.
"La Mer…."
I could barely hear him. His voice was ragged and low, as if saying those simple words had used all his energy. His head bowed further, falling against my open palm. He mewed softly in obvious agony.
"Who did this?" I asked.
He didn’t answer, but shakily breathed. His whole body shuddered with the effort.
"Fuck," I cursed, looking over to his hands. "Don’t worry, sweetie, I’ll get you out…."
I reached for his wrist, using one hand to hold it against the glowing cross. He cried out softly, and I could smell burnt flesh. I quickly got a grip on the blood-slicked spike, and yanked on it as hard as I could. It made a loud suctioning noise before coming out. His arm fell limply at his side. I grabbed it, looping it around my neck. I then reached for his other wrist, pulling out the other spike. The full weight of his body pressed against me as I bent down, pressing my foot against his ankles.
He cried out as his flesh pressed against the arm of my coat. I ignored it for a moment as I pulled the spike out of his feet. It took all my strength to prop up the dead weight of his body as I climbed down from the blood-splattered altar. I looked around wildly, making sure that we weren’t going to be jumped by Esemono, or whoever did this. I noticed a side door, and decided to take that one, rather than bringing a bleeding vampire into the middle of the street. Once out the door, I half dragged, half carried Seifer to the edge of the woods that backed onto the church’s property. I lay him on his back, cradling his head and shoulders in my lap.
"Seifer?!" I whispered, brushing my fingertips across his forehead.
He opened his eyes wearily. Getting out of the church must have helped a little. He groaned in pain as my arm brushed against him. I looked down at my jacket. I smiled softly, yanking it off, and tossing it into the darkness, the night air cutting through the thin material of my white tank top, chilling my bare arms.
He breathed weakly as he looked up at me. His eyes looked so flat, so dead.
"I’m sorry, La Mer…." He whispered.
"Shh, shh," I murmured, stroking his forehead. He was so cold. I felt a few tears run down my cheeks, splattering onto Seifer's. He closed his eyes slowly, his body shuddering with the effort of staying alive.
"Isn’t there anything I can do?" I whimpered, leaning into him. I pressed my forehead against his cheek.
Seifer moaned weakly, whimpering.
"Who did this…..?" I trailed off, thinking about the ivory dragons floating from behind the doorway. How could Seifer have been there if the church left him feeling so weak? I thought about the way Sephiroth had leered at me, leaning so close, despite my coat…. "Sephiroth?"
He sighed in agreement, his head lolling to the side. I stroked his hair, my body becoming racked with silent sobs.
"Please, Squall, it’s better this way…."
I groaned angrily. "No, it isn’t!! How can it be better if you’re dead?!"
"I’m already dead."
I sobbed bitterly, pressing my lips to his. I felt his fangs, hard against my quivering mouth. He breathed heavily against my lips, making a wheezing noise.
"Drink some of my blood," I commanded gently.
Seifer shook his head. "No."
"No? It will help heal you, no?"
"….Yes…. But…."
"But what?" I kissed him again, my mouth barely touching his.
"I’d.. have to kill…..you….."
I looked down at him. "What do you mean?"
"To get enough strength to survive, I’d have to take most of your blood….. you wouldn’t survive.." He turned his face away from me, his eyes rolling into the back of his head.
I snorted in frustration, ripping a strip of material from the bottom of my tank top. I began to bind his hands to prevent more blood loss. "Then take me…."
Seifer moaned. I could tell he was protesting.
"Bring me over," I suggested, binding his other hand. "Embrace me, whatever you call it. Just take me." I moved to remove his shoes, ripping more of my shirt. I shivered as most of my chest was now exposed.
"No," Seifer whispered. "No."
"Why not? It will save your life!"
"I… don’t have a… life!" Seifer spat weakly. It came out as more of a gasp.
"And I don’t have a life without you!" I exclaimed, moving so that my throat was pressed against his mouth. "Just do it!"
He turned his head away. "I can’t."
"Why?" I begged. I sounded really pathetic, and it caused Seifer to look at me. He used so much strength just to reach his hand up to stroke my cheekbone.
"I don’t want to…….punish you the…same way…..that I am." His voice sounded so weak now. "I….don’t want you…..to be a ser….servant for eternity….."
"Servant?" I asked quietly, still pressing my throat to him, offering myself.
"Ser……vant to the…….blood…………."
I could feel his body shaking under me, from both the effort of speaking, and the smell of my blood. I groaned, raking my neck over his sharp fangs, which were protruding through his parted lips. This gently broke the skin, creating two small stinging trails in my skin. I felt the blood run down my neck before traveling into his slackened mouth. Both of our bodies shivered at once, mine from anticipation, his from thirst. I just waited as my blood continued to slowly trickle into his mouth. I could tell that he was still trying to resist me, but I was patient enough to wait. He finally gave in, and I gasped as his razor fangs dug into my flesh. I continued to cradle his head, titling it upwards so he could plunge his teeth deeper into my neck. My jerking motion caused the two small wounds to tear, maximizing the blood flow into Seifer's now greedy mouth.
"Seifer," I whispered as he drank. I had never felt closer to him. The fact that I was giving my life to him made the bond to him in my heart stronger. I sighed, closing my eyes, losing myself against his now heated mouth. I forgot about everything else, about Sephiroth, about Esemono, about Tifa, about Irvine’s rotting corpse. It all seemed so far away. Seifer was the only thing in my realm, the only thing I felt, the only thing I wanted to feel. I began to moan softly as he sucked harder. This was a greater high than the most passionate sex, than the most powerful drug. The dizzying sensation of my life flowing into Seifer's mouth was staggering. It put all my nerves on edge, made them raw. I repeated his name over and over again, my voice getting quieter. I began to feel weak, my grip on Seifer's shoulders getting more flimsy.
I felt him sit up, his strength returning. He wound his limbs around my body, legs and arms pulling me closer to him. I sighed, throwing my head back. My vision was getting darker, pricked with little points of light. I moaned in pleasure as he cradled me against his chest. I listened to his heart. The beat was becoming steadier, but also more muted, farther away. I moaned in disappointment when he released his grip on me, pulling his mouth away. I blearily opened my eyes, wondering why he stopped. He looked at me, a sad look on his beautiful face.
"Don’t be sad," I whispered, my voice almost failing me.
Seifer silently sighed, bringing a wounded hand to his neck. I could tell that the bleeding was already stopping. He dug one fingernail into his flesh, scratching across his neck. A small ribbon of blood began to push out of the cut, bubbling over thickly. He craned his neck, offering me to drink. I bent my head, greedily lapping at the wound. I ran across its length with my tongue, pushing down in order to get more into my mouth. I wasn’t satisfied by the small trickle, so I dug my teeth in, practically tearing at his jugular. He moaned softly in my ear, gripping a healthy handful of my hair. I sucked quickly, wanting to bring as much of his blood into my body as possible. As I suckled, I realized that I was getting incredibly hard. As I drank, I gently rolled my hips against Seifer's thigh.
"La Mer…" He whispered, his breath tickling the curl of my ear.
His blood tasted like heaven, and as I drank, I felt my strength returning tenfold. It tasted like life, more intoxicating than Irvine’s had been, and I wanted more, more. I didn’t think that an endless supply could quench my thirst for his blood, for him.
"Enough," Seifer whispered.
I moaned in protest, sucking hard on the wound. He gripped my hair, pulling my face away. I frowned, showing my displeasure. He continued to grip my hair, as he craned my neck by force. He sank his teeth into the already healing wound with such force that I cried out in pain. This time, his sucking was more forceful, needy. It didn’t take long for me to feel weak again.
"Yes, Seifer….." I murmured dreamily as my vision went black.
He continued to drink, and I felt my muscles beginning to stiffen, scream out for oxygen, cry out for life. I smiled, leaning against Seifer's now hot chest, as he killed me.