Love is all that matters
Chapter 3: Almost said
By Marylou
Author's note: I had some reviews telling me that I should include Legolas’ POV as well, but I’m not quite sure about that. I wanted to write this story strictly from Aragorn’s POV, because I was bored of all those fics, where Legolas desperately awaits a look from the ranger, but now I don’t actually don’t know what to do. Maybe, I’ll let Legolas tell you a few things about his feelings in the next chapter, what do you think? Please review and I shall pass him the message!
Disclaimer: Everything belongs to J.R.R. Tolkien.
Love is all that matters
Chapter 3: Almost said
By Marylou
I did not know how quickly our days in Rivendell had passed. I did not know how many days we had been traveling. And I certainly did not know how I would manage to pass the wild edge of Caradhras.
I was cold and shaky and all my strength seemed to be lost, as I was being tormented by high fever. Still I did not wish to trouble my companions about the state of my health. I knew that they all relied on me to lead them through the mountains, because, after all, I was the one who had instructed them to follow this path.
I was more than grateful, when we finally took the decision to stop under this rock. It was no safe place and it definitely did not protect us from the cold, but it was the only option we had.
This would be my last day alive, I was sure about that. The cold air was piercing through my bones and the high fever made it even worse. I desperately needed another blanket, but I knew that I could not ask for it, as my companions needed them as much as I did.
I sat alone, away from the others, so that no one could notice that I was sick. I sunk my head and began rocking back and forth, in a desperate attempt to warm my exhausted body a little.
All of a sudden, I felt two warm hands embracing my shoulders. "Aragorn, what is wrong with you?" I heard Legolas asking me with his melodic voice.
He had noticed that I was sick. He had noticed and he had come to help me. Even the thought of that warmed my heart a little bit. Still, I did not want to upset him. "I’m fine," I managed to whisper between my teeth.
Obviously, he was not convinced. He placed a hand on my forehead and let out an anguish cry. "Elbereth! You are burning with fever! Why didn’t you say anything?" he asked, sounding almost angry.
I opened my mouth to speak, but he expected no answer. "Gimli, give me my bag and my blanket," he ordered the dwarf and he handed him his stuff.
Legolas kneeled down behind me and after he covered me with the blanket, he put his hands around me. I felt him sit on the ground and all of a sudden, my whole body was covered with his, as his hands were around my waist and his long legs covered mine.
In his hands, he held a small vial. "This will help you get warmer," he told me, "Can you rub it on yourself, or do you need help?"
I took the vial in my hands and with a big effort, I managed to open it. But, my fingers were so cold that I dropped it to the ground, before I could manage to use it.
With great determination, Legolas lifted the vial and covered his fingers with the oil. When his hands slid under my clothes, I had to bit my lips to suppress a moan. Even thought I was physically exhausted, I still felt my body responding to the elf’s gentle touch.
It was the most wonderful feeling I had ever experienced. I felt butterflies inside my stomach, as Legolas rubbed my chest with smooth movements, taking all the time of the world.
Between half-closed eyelids, I could see that the others were watching as with a critical expression on their faces. Legolas must have noticed as well, for he bent to down to whisper in my ear, in elvish "Do not mind about their looks."
"I do not," I whispered faintly. After a short while, he finished applying the oil and for a brief moment, he removed his hands from my waist. I let out a small whimper and he immediately took me in his arms again.
"We’re cold too, you know," I heard Gimli saying with an irritated tone in his voice. Legolas neutrally threw him the vial and turned his attention back to me. He brought his hands to my face and gently caressed my cheeks.
"Why do you always have to be so stubborn? Whey didn’t you say anything?" he asked me with a sad voice. I tried to lean to his caress as much as I could.
"I didn’t want to worry you," I said and immediately bit my lip. I had almost added the words ‘my love’ after that.
"Yet, you worry me now, Aragorn," Legolas said quietly and tightened his grip around my body, "You should sleep now. You must get as much rest as you can. I will watch over you."
I was to weak to protest so I soon drifted into sleep. It was the most pleasant night of my life, as I lay there in the arms of the person I loved more than anything in the whole world.
<> Lothlorien <> (Yes, I left way tooo many scenes out, but I had to)
I was very annoyed by the fact that Legolas avoided being with the fellowship during our residence in Lorien.
I was missing his presence greatly and I also regretted the fact that I still had not found the opportunity to thank him for what the did for me in Caradhras.
Many weeks had passed since then, but we were so focused on our quest and always so tensed that we were never given the opportunity to have a serious discussion.
I felt very relieved when I finally discovered him sitting under a tree at the river’s bench. I approached him with slow steps, but he immediately sensed me and turned to face me.
His lips curled into a smile when he saw me. "I thought it might be you," he told me quietly.
"Can I sit with you?" I asked, suppressing the need to take him in my arms immediately.
"Of course," he said and flashed me another smile, which lit up my heart.
I sat on the ground, as close to him as I could. "The fellowship has been missing your company in the last days," I told him.
He looked at me for a few moments, with an unreadable expression on his face and then turned his gaze back to the river. "I like spending time with others of my kind, while I still can."
"I see," I said, trying to hide a sad hint from my voice, "You obviously got tired of us."
"I hope that you are joking, Aragorn," he told me with a frown, "I would never get tired of you."
I could not help but ask the question that burned my mouth, "Of the fellowship or me?"
At first, he did not answer. He stared at me, like he was trying to scan through my soul. "Why are you asking?" he finally inquired.
I wondered what I should say. I knew that I should better drop the subject, but I was given a unique chance to say some things to my elf, that I otherwise would never have the chance to say. "It means a lot for me to find out."
The silence around us was almost unbearable. Legolas just seemed to be lost of words.
After what seemed like an eternity, he spoke, choosing the words carefully. "I would never get tired of you, my dear Aragorn."
I gasped when I heard his words. For some reason, I was almost sure that his words had a much deeper meaning, than it seemed. Was this his way of trying to tell me that he cared about me? And if he did, in which way?
The words ‘my dear’ echoed in my ears several times, as I tried to clear up what was said to me. I really did not know how to approach the situation, so I decided to say what I first intended to do, still staying in the subject.
"I never really got the chance to thank you for what you did for me at the mountains," I told him earnestly, "You saved my life."
I stretched out my hand to him and, much to my surprise, he took it, without a second thought.
"I did what I had to do. I would never forgive myself, if something had happened to you," he said and smiled at me coyly.
"I never thought that this was possible," he continued, "But I now see you as my best friend."
His words warmed my heart and I could not suppress the question that has tormented me through the years "Just a friend, Legolas?"
His eyes widened when he heard my words, but he did not remove his hand from mine. I tightened my grip to encourage him. He seemed not to know how to react.
He had finally opened his mouth to speak, when he suddenly pulled his hand away and turned his head.
I turned my head as well and was surprised to see lady Galadriel standing above us. I had not heard her coming, but that was normal, as she was an elf and I was too distracted by Legolas.
"I do not wish to interrupt you, but I would like to talk to you son of Thranduil," she said. Her face was impassive, but I could detect a slight hint of annoyance in her voice.
Legolas bit his lower lip, as he nodded and threw me a nervous look. I quickly stood up and began walking away after glancing at him one last time.
I felt so frustrated. I had finally been given the perfect opportunity to clear things out with my beloved and I highly doubted that I would find the courage to speak to him about these things again.
It had barely been an hour, when I saw the White Lady approaching me. I wondered what she had to say to me.
"May I have a word with you, Dunadan?" she asked me with her calm voice.
"Of course," I said neutrally, trying to sound as polite as I could.
"I am sorry that I interrupted your earlier conversation with the prince of Mirkwood," she said.
I looked at her impassively. I had a very bad feeling about where she was heading. When she saw that I did not react, she continued, "It seemed very important."
"Do not torture me with this procedure," I snapped, "Just tell me what you know and what you want to ask and let us get over this."
She raised an eyebrow. "I see that you have become rather tempered, Elessar," she said calmly, "But I will get to the point, as you wish. To think that you truly love him, is nothing but a foolish game of the heart."
I barely suppressed the intense need to slap her. "Really?" I asked sarcastically.
"Really. You do not have such feelings for him. The frustration and the pressure of this quest are the only reasons, which make you long for a body to fulfill your needs. And the prince happens to posses a dazzling beauty. In reality, your heart still sings for the one it belongs."
"And it belongs to the Evenstar?" I asked with a grimace of doubt. I really wanted to scream to her, that she was talking nonsense and that Legolas was the only person I had ever loved so deeply, but I got a hold of myself, out of respect to her.
"Do you doubt it?" she asked, looking a little angry by now.
I sighed. "I think that there is no use in continuing this conversation, my lady, because we will not come to a conclusion," I said and began walking away, when she called for me again.
"Be careful, Elessar," she said seriously, "Do not let the situation get out of control. It may be dangerous for you."
<> Many days later <>
When Legolas and I strode alone, away from the fellowship, searching for the portage-way at the western side of the river, I decided to confront him once more, with the hope that I would finally get the answer to the question that tormented my heart
"There is a serious discussion that we have left unfinished, my friend," I told him quietly, "And a question that I would love to have it answered by you."
He turned his gaze from the path and threw me a questioning look with his big brown eyes. "To what do you refer?"
"To our conversation that was interrupted by lady Galadriel. I had asked you... " I was left mid-sentenced, as Legolas waved his hand violently to stop me.
"I do not wish to talk about that, Aragorn," he told me, sounding almost angry.
"But... " I tried to protest, without an effort, as he spoke again, to prevent me from talking.
"There are not buts, Dunadan. Do not talk anymore. I wish to walk in silence," he stated firmly and strode ahead.
I fought away the tears that threatened to spill on my face and walk behind him. Once again, he had shuddered the slight hope that was beginning to grow in my heart.
To be continued...