Author's Note: ::evil laughter:: Oh the perverted things I will weave! This is my second Dead or Alive fic... The first one was NC-17, and if you’re reading this, then you should damn well know that this *too* is NC-17 and unless you can handle it, you shouldn’t be reading it. Flame me if you want, but all I’ll do is laugh at the stupid reason why lemons are bad... Everyone *KNOWS* lemons are bad, but they wouldn’t be fun otherwise, ne? This is a Hayabusa/Hayate pairing... There ain’t no plot here, so I dub it a PWP... If you don’t like gay man sex, [Doesn’t that sound so wrong and very hilarious at the same time...?] then you should click, ‘Back’, on whichever browser you’re on... Review, onegai!

Warning: Extreme perversity. Humor. Characters *VERY* OOC... And I really mean it this time... Hell, you could consider it a rape fic if you want... Cursing is abundant, so if you don’t like it, go back or try to ignore it... If you don’t like guys screwing one another or profanity, then why the hell are you still reading this?

A Night At the Bar

Part 1

By Junko

       

Hayabusa downed another shot... and another and yet another, repeatedly until he could barely even see the glass to pick it up... He looked at Hayate, or at least where he last remembered seeing him, through blurred vision. In a very slurred voice he asked the blur, “How many drinks have I had?”

Hayate shrugged, though he knew exactly how many. He raised his own glass as the other shinobi downed another one. Hayabusa could really pack them away when he wanted to... that had been his 9th glass... He was surprised that he was still standing, or rather, had enough balance to keep from falling off the stool... Hayabusa raised another to his lips with the bartender looking at him wearily, when Hayate took it from him and drank it himself.

“I think you’ve had enough... I’m not carrying you all the way out to your apartment just because you couldn’t walk...”

Hayabusa, slightly angry, tapped his finger on the bar, “I think I can walk just fine...!” he said, though slurred. He stood up and went into a handstand and flipped out. “See? Just fine...!” He might have been believable until he had to grab the edge of the bar to keep himself from wobbling.

“Yeah... right...” Hayate muttered, paying the bartender before walking out. Hayabusa followed close behind... a lot closer than normal...

As they walked, Hayate could see Hayabusa bouncing up and down out of the corner of his eye. He could only assume that once his inhibitions were gone, he acted very much like a hyper active child. “Ne, Hayate!” Hayabusa said, his eyes gleaming strangely, “Why don’t you give me a piggy back ride!”

Hayate allowed a small sweatdrop to run down his face. “No.”

Hayabusa pouted, “Whhhhy nooootttt?” he whined, his eyes starting to glimmer as tears formed. [I TOLD you... Very OOC... I don’t think Hayabusa would ever do this, even if he was on the verge of passing out... Never never... But that’s what makes Fanfics so fun!]

“What’s the point when we’re in front of your apartment?” Hayate muttered, gesturing to the building they were standing in front of.

Hayabusa looked very disappointed as he eyed the familiar place. Suddenly getting excited, he turned to him, “Then you can come inside!” He latched onto Hayate’s wrist and dragged him towards his door. He fumbled with the keys in one hand while trying to subdue the struggling Hayate with the other. He found the key and with a giggle of excitement, yes a giggle, he opened the door and dragged the very desperate Hayate into his living room. He closed and locked every single lock on the door. [And you know apartments... They have at least 2! But the one Hayabusa lives in has three, a dead bolt, a chain, and a doorknob lock...!]

Hayate, starting to get a little frightened by the shinobi’s strange behavior, backed away to what he thought was a safe distance. The shinobi in question whipping around, his pony tail following behind in a smooth line. “Sate...! [Which means ‘Well’] What would you like? Something to drink? eat? A pillow? A nice fuck in the shower?”

Hayate twitched at the last question. He started to wonder if it had heard him right... “W-What did you just say?”

“Something to drink?” he said, confused.

“No not that... something about the shower...”

“Oh, that!” he said, acting very giddy, “I asked if you wanted to take a shower...”

“Eto... No thanks...” Hayate said, raising his hands. That didn’t sound like what he had said earlier to him... Maybe he was just reading too much into it...

“Oh, come one! You’re all sweaty cus is was all hot in that bar! Don’t cha’ wanna feel all nice n’ clean?”

Hayate gave another twitch and wondered if all that alcohol could have completely fried his brain... “I think I’ll be just fine, Hayabusa... I should be leaving...”

“IIE!” Hayabusa said angrily, and glared at him. Hayate blinked at his outburst, it was so sudden, then it was over. He was smiling again. “Just sit down and relax!” Hayabusa said, pushing Hayate onto the couch before walking into his kitchen. He could hear the clinking of glass and the sound of liquid being poured.

In a matter of seconds Hayabusa had come out with two glasses filled with water. He handed one to Hayate before gulping down half of what was in his. Hayate lifted an eyebrow... “What the hell is wrong with you, Ryu?” he asked seriously.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, “I’ll tell you what the *Hell* the matter is! [Ok... the really bad cursing begins here] We both should be butt-fucking-naked!” He stood up and put his hands on his hips, “We should be fucking in that very spot you’re sitting in!” he shouted, pointing at him. “Why the hell aren’t we fucking dammit?! That’s what I got so god damn drunk for god dammit! How much easier can I make it for you?!”

Hayate’s jaw dropped. He had gotten drunk for WHAT?!?! With HIM?!?!

“That’s it!” Hayabusa growled. He pulled his shirt off and threw it away from him. He undid his belt and let his pants drop to the floor. “Strip! NOW!”

Hayate was still too dumbstruck to even move... “For Kami’s sake!! Are you just gonna sit there or are you going to help me with this?!” Hayabusa growled again, pointing at the oh so very obvious bulge in his pants.

“The reason you asked me out for a drink was so you could get drunk and let me take advantage of you?!” Hayate said, completely and utterly confused.

“Why the hell else?!” Hayabusa snapped. There was a very awkward silence. Now that he thought about it, there really *was* no reason for Hayabusa to invite him out to drink... Especially since Hayabusa *didn’t* drink...

Hayabusa gave a frustrated howl before pouncing on the still pondering Hayate... “Na-Nani?!?! What the fuck...! Get the hell off of me!! RYU!” was Hayate's desperate cry as Hayabusa proceeded to tear off his clothes. He had managed to get his shirt off, unbuckle *and* unbutton his pants without a problem, but now Hayabusa was having trouble with getting the pants *off*.

“Stay the fuck still!” Hayabusa ordered as he struggled to push Hayate’s pants down.

“Why the *hell* would I do that?! Do you know what you’re doing?!” Hayate screamed, trying to push the very clingy Hayabusa away from him. Under normal circumstances, which these were not, he was the stronger of the two. But now, strangely enough, when Hayabusa was drunk and quite obviously sex driven, he was infinitely stronger. What kind of fucking sense did that make...?!

“God damn pants!” Hayabusa cursed as he finally managed to strip Hayate of them and they too were thrown away. He pulled off Hayate’s socks, which seemed to confuse the one in question. “I hate it when men have sex with their socks on... In every porn movie I see the guy never bothers to take them off?! How the hell can anyone be so fuckin’ lazy?!” Hayabusa snorted in response.

Hayate had another mental freeze. Hayabusa watched porn? Oh hell... this was definately a dream... He would wake up any second now to see his room...

Instead, Hayabusa grabbed his boxers, the only thing that stood in the way of Hayate being completely naked, and gave them a yank. Hayate cursed and managed to keep them on and himself covered. Hayabusa decided that if Hayate wouldn’t willingly let himself be stripped, he’d finish taking off his own clothes before going back to the task. He pulled off his socks and his boxers, too. Hayate nearly choked on his spit and errupted in a fit of coughs.

During Hayate’s moment of inattention Hayabusa ripped off his boxers. Hayate quickling leaned forward and covered himself, extremely embarassed. He glared up at Hayabusa, who was looking victorious. “One day, I’m going to look back on this and laugh...” he muttered, “But right now... I’m going to mother fucking *KILL* you!!!”

He lunged forward and caught Hayabusa in a head lock. Hayabusa, feeling Hayate rub against him gave a smile even as he struggled to breathe... “If you wanted to be on top, all you had to do was ask...”

At the mental picture Hayate grew numb. Hayabusa turned around and captured his lips. Hayate felt dizzy and fell back to the couch with Hayabusa crashing on top of him.

“Tonikaku...” Hayabusa said, suddenly pleasant again since he had Hayate under control, “Let’s see if we can do something about this...” he said with a smile, as he looked at Hayate’s growing erection. He leaned over and slid it in his mouth. There was an immediate reaction from Hayate who thrusted his hips upward, forcing [Junko-kun coughs] ‘it’ further down Hayabusa’s throat. He also gave a moan and gripped at the carpet.

For someone who doesn’t want to have sex with me, he sure does seem to be enjoying himself, Hayabusa thought happily as he looked at Hayate’s expression. He slid his mouth away and briefly licked the tip. Hayabusa heard a whimper from Hayate’s general direction. There was a chuckle from him as he went over to the other end of the couch.

“Up we go...!” Hayabusa said cheerfully and lifted Hayate up into a sitting position. He wobbled a little. Hayate was heavy as a bitch! But he was all muscle, so you’d expect that. He continued to push him forward until Hayate was on his hands and knees. Hayate was still a little too bewildered by the sudden pleasure to react at all to what was happening to him. If he had been thinking clearly, he would have realized exactly what was going to happen with him in his current position. He leaned back and sat on his heels with a confused sigh.

“My poor Hayate-chan...” Hayabusa mused, licking the side of his neck. He grabbed Hayate’s shaft gently. There was a small quirk of his lips and a twitch. My, my, Hayabusa thought, He’s rather responsive, ne? Then I wonder what’ll happen if I... He pumped his hand once. A shudder ran through Hayate’s body.

“Hayabusa...” Hayate murmered. It felt good, and since his conscience was now gone, and any type of rational thinking was gone, he knew *exactly* what he wanted...

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