Chapter 29 - NOT another chapter full of nothing, this chapter should be entitled 'Conspiracy'... Finally our hero Kazuya has a go in the battle arena where he gains himself enough battle points for Omnislash, his ultimate limit break and a few nice stuff for his girl... Jun: Oh, honey... Kazuya blushes like a teenager in love for the first time... But let us not forget why we're here. Reason is the keystone, which is kept in Dio's private collection. Kaz: Say Jun... I think we're alone... Jun: But honey... Kaz: No but. We haven't had a single second to oursleves. Jun: But honey!... Kazuya says nothing, instead pulls Jun to his arms and takes her in a soft, tender kiss, failing to notice Dio staring at them from the door... Kaz: WHAT?!? Dio (with Kossak's body and dubbed voice): Oh please, go on, don't let me stop you! Kaz: This is a conspiracy! Dio: No, not yet, this isn't it... Jun: Em, honey, (licking her lips) why don't you tell Dio what you're here for? Kaz: Okay, let's get over with it... Dio, I want you to hand me the keystone. Dio: Not so fast! What do you think that I'll just hand it over, for charity? Kaz: (sigh...) I had this feeling you wouldn't... Dio: Of course I wouldn't now, would I? You value it, I can get something out of that. Kaz: ...shoot! Dio: Entertain me! Kaz: ! Jun: (honey, what is he talking about?) Kaz: (you don't want to know) - Forget it! Dio: You'll never get the keystone like this! Kaz: Okay, second try. What do you want? Dio: I could do with what you gave her a little earlier, for a start... Audience: Ooooooow! (as in surprised) Kaz: Absolutely NOT! Dio: Well, you asked for the keystone... (puffs at his nails) Jun: (whispering) Honey let's get out, follow my lead... Kaz: ? Jun smiles to Dio as she takes Kazuya by the hand and makes for the exit... Dio: Sneaking away? ;) Kaz: (shakes his hand off) Can't you settle for something else? Jun: Maybe if we paid for it? Dio: Look sweetheart, do you think there's something I can't have? I have money enough to bathe in! Jun: That's not very healthy, you know money are transferred from hand to hand, you could get all sorts of microbes... Kaz: Honey, you're not helping. Dio: Oh but she's right! Look at you! The beasts you fight and the places you go! You're in a mess! Why would I take money you touched? Kaz: Who's in a mess? Dio: Heh, all right, you'll do the battle arena for me. If you win, I'll let you have the keystone! Kaz: ... right. That'll be all. Dio: A deal is a deal with me... Kaz: Jun, you go to Red while I'm away. Dio: Oh, you don't trust me with her? Kaz: What gives you the idea? Jun: Honey, I'll be okay. You go get us that keystone, right? Kaz: ... Jun: I'll PHS the others to join me. Okay? Kaz: ... Okay. But I won't be long! Dio: Me neither! ;) Kaz: Arrrr! (attempts to attack Dio but the game automatically moves him into the battle arena where there are monsters for him to fight... And let me assure you my readers that indeed he fights and wins his duels, we haven't trained him for nothing now, have we? So when he gets out, he finds Jun and Dio waiting for him... Dio: See? No harm done. Kaz: Hand the keystone. Dio: Won't you say please? Kaz: argfrarfarfgrhrshrhrl (this could go on for ages...) Jun: Honey, show some manners! Kaz: ARGHRLFRZSHR~ PLEAZE! Dio: See, it wasn't that hard! Here's the keystone! It's all yours to figure! Jun: Actually it is indeed a mighty weird stone... Kaz: We'll leave it to Red... Hey! No extra gifts? Dio: A, a, a, don't get greedy! Kazuya begins to mimic Dio when suddenly the PHS rings... PHS: riiiiiing... Jun: Yes? PHS: Congratulations! You won an one time offer for a trip to Hawai... Kaz: DUH! Dio: Don't trust them, it's all a bunch of lies. Kaz: No kidding! Jun: We thank you, we're not interested... PHS: Hey Jun, it's me, Cait Sith! Jun: Cait Sith? PHS: Yea, only now it's the moogle talking, who's cooler and not the cat... Kaz: I always thought it was the moogle... Jun: Oh... PHS: Meet in the Ghost hotel okay? Rest goes pretty much as you remember it... oooh, don't you get the goosebumps, knowing in what phase our adventure is heading to? Yes indeed... it's getting closer to the end of the first critical phase of our journey... that which will demand a great sacrifice... CS: Which *I* predicted, may I remind you! Red: You said it already Cait Sith... CS: And did I hear 'thank you'? Bruce: Jeez, why should I thank ye? Vincent: I think we all need the rest and the clarity of thoughts... Mel: Yea, who needs Jun with you around. CS: I beg your pardon my dear, I happen to like the girl! Xiaoyu: May I take a snooze? Cid: @#$%^&, why is it that whenever it's my turn to talk they hold the Shift key down and strike random numerical keys? Mel: I don't have the sliiiiightest idea! Red: Where is Cloud and Aeris? Kaz: (ironically) We've been here a while ago but we thought standing silent like statues is better... Bruce: Yo, shu'up, you've had half the chapter to yourself! Kaz: And I'll take over the entire fic if I have to! Jun: Honey... Kaz: And not another word! Everyone: ... Kaz: That's more like it. Red (ignoring Cloud): Now that you steamed off, let's all gather around and talk. Cid: @#$%^&, every time I go talk to the ghosts sitting on that table at the lobby, they never answer back! CS: Sikes... Red: So you see, now we have the Keystone and we can enter the Temple of the Ancients... Vincent: Oh, the sound of the name alone! So promising of ruins and secrets unsaid, memories of a world lost for ever... Xiaoyu: eeek.... Kazuya says nothing just looks fondly at Vincent... Bruce: Yo, never mind, I don't care, you go to your spiderwebbed ruin alone for all that I care! Jun: I must definitely go! I have to see for myself that place! I know it's my call! Mel: Don't you just hate her! Red: So we rest tonight and tomorrow we go to the Temple. Meet early to catch up breakfast... CS: I know a joke, anyone wants to hear? But as everyone goes to their bedrooms, Cait Sith is left behind in the empty lobby... Are you tired of Kazuya my dear friends? I guess with Cloud being the default player you don't get a choice, so here you go... We are in Kazuya's bedroom... he's alone, wearing polka dot underwear... Kaz: ... (now that's a glare you don't want to see) Eheheh! ^_^U Actually Kazuya looks cool in his armor, staring outside the window at the lights of the Golden Saucer and I wonder what he is thinking about when his door is rapped... Jun: Hi! ^_^ Kaz: Hmm, Jun! What a pleasant surprise! ;) Jun: How would you like us to go on a stroll around? >Ta-CHINK!< Kazuya looks disappointed... Jun: Honey now, cheer up! We're in the golden saucer! Kaz: I say we have a very comfortable bed right here...? (hopeful eyes) Jun: Honey? (looks nervously at murmuring audience) Kaz: Grrr... we won't go back to the days when I had to buy you dinner for a lay! Jun: Hon~! (absolutely shocked) Kaz: :$ Jun: Oh let us not spoil the mood, it's free events night tonight! Kaz: (Super excited) Why didn't you say so earlier!! Hooo boy! Free races! And speed! And the battle arena! And~ Jun: (whispering) actually honey, only the event is in the script... Where Kazuya flips out... Kaz: The event! Jun: (innocently smiling) Well shall we? Kaz: Errr... why don't we rent a movie and be cozy on the bed? Jun: Oh, you're incorrigible! (goes behind him and pushes him outside, despite him kicking against the floor... who would have thought Jun to be that strong!) So on their way to the Event, our hero makes a blatant mistake... Kaz: (sighs) What else could go wrong? >Ta-Daaaaa!!< Moral of the story: Never ask how things could go worse. They will, because as our couple enters the crammed event area, spotlights fall on them... Announcer: Congratulations! You are the hundredth couple coming and now you will participate in the play! Kaz: AAARGH!!!! (flips out) Jun: And where's the bad to that? While our hero is in total hysteria, Jun and a man from the stage take him behind the scenes... Jun: Oh honey, how romantic! Kaz: You mean, I must act in an act??? Jun, get me out of here! Jun: Oh now, don't be such an irritable kid, come and let's have fun! Kaz: grmfhrmpfrhr! Lights out, a somewhat rustic melody plays and the curtain opens to reveal a Kazuya in stage fright... Knight: Oh... Du muss der held Alfred sein! (Oh! You must be the hero Alfred!) Kaz: ...Siegfried? Sieg: Ya, ya, wie gehts! (Yes, yes, how's it going?) Kaz: Sikes! Maxi: Is 'sikes' the latest craze or is it me? Audience: Shhhhht! Maxi: Oh, sorry, I didn't think anyone's watching~ Audience: SHHHHHHHHHHHT! Maxi: Okay, okay! hmpf, hrmpf, hrmpf... Upon the stage then appears a distraught King... King: Meow! Not that King! King: Oh, sikes... Maxi: THERE! THERE AGAIN! Audience: SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHT! Maxi: Alright, Alright! I know when I get annoying, don't scream! Argh... sik~ eheh! ^_^ Well, next appears a wizard and a dragon, played by Nightwolf and Kung Lao, covered by a sheet, Nightwolf holds the head of the dragon and this dragon holds Princess Jun as captive! Jun: Oh help me... legendary hero Alfred! Kaz: Arrr... King: Please save my daughter! Wizard: Only the power of love can save her now... Kaz: Yah, grah... this is lame! King: (pssst! You wanna embarass your girl?) Kaz (frowning): (what are my alternatives?) King: (you can either kiss me, the dragon or the princess...) Kaz: Kiss you?!? King: If you want... Kaz: Hrrrr... Narrator: Oh, what is it going to be? What will our hero do? Will he continue standing there like a log or is he... Jun: (honey!) Oh legendary hero! Won't you rescue me? Kaz: Well... let's be nice... (I'll get you for it later!) Me: 8( So our hero Kazuya goes before Jun, kneels like a valiant knight and takes her hand in his and kisses it. Audience: Aaaawwwwww! Jun: Honey~ err... Alfred! Dragon: Warh! I'm defeated! The dragon runs away, legs going right, head going left... Narrator: So the story ends with the dragon being, er... torn apart and the triumph of love! Under wild cheers the cast vanishes in pirouettes... Picture this my friends, Kazuya doing a pirouette... Kaz: Picture a magnum on your head! >;[ Err, okay... but the event was a success? Jun: Oh honey... thank you, Thank you! (hangs on him full of joy) Kaz: Heh, Jun... But before he can say a thing, she silences him with a kiss... Audience: AAAAWWWWWWWW! (clap, clap, clap!) Jun: Say honey... Kaz: What? Jun: The round is free tonight... Kaz: So? Jun: I figured... how if we took a ride with that magnificent view... all alone? ...yes my dear friends. A smile lights Kazuya's face who takes his girl by the hand and they enter the coach... I think they deserve this time to themselves, so let us withdraw and stay away, happy for the joy they have found... CS: I say, is someone forgetting something around? This should be MY showtime? Maxi: Oh, shut up you! ...I think I'll agree with Maxi this once~ >WOF!< oooow!!! X(