Chapter 3 - The bombing of sector 7 A new misty and filthy dawn rises over the pitiful lives of the people of the slums. Not even the sun graces them with more than reminders of its presense... The only sky they wake up to and sleep under, is this of Midgar's rotten pizza... If my audience is so kind as to interject the music theme of Nibelheim, they will know the feeling better. I was reluctant to put music in my texts, as I know it's annoying when it comes to the world wide web, but if desired, add that music background, or let it hum in your heads... Yes, it is a sad day for the slums, not unlike the ones before it. Yet, the courage and dedication work on our fearless heroes better than the coffee they cannot get anyway, and they are up and ready early... or is it fear for Tifa's demanding attacks? Mel: I didn't get that! Kaz: Well, you can't be getting _everything_, can you? Mel: Hmp! Well, I wouldn't mind getting my hands on your~ hey! Is this an ice materia? I want it! Kaz: Don't touch my balls without permission! (line courtesy of "police academy, was it 5? Who really cares!") Mel: You are one Selfish man! Kazuya makes faces as though chewing on his sarcasm. Biggs: Why don't I get some materia too? Wedge: Because you play someone who doesn't get any materia, KOOOOSSAK! Biggs: MOOOOOOOOOF! But... it so happens that Tifa does get the ice materia and Kazuya grumbles staring at it, like a small child... Kaz: sniff, sniff... My materia... sniff. Mileena on the other hand caresses her toy. Our heroes are now ready. They leave for the train, that will transport them to their destination. Biggs, Jessie and Wedge are coming along. Pardon our repetition but in the train, our dear Kazuya will play the double role of Cloud and of the Shinra manager... (well, he does look a lot like him, doesn't he?) Kaz: My suit! I got my purple suit back! And my beloved hair! And, oh! I'm in charge again! Oh how I love myself! (hugs himself with a smile of anime thrill...) Mel: My god, what are you, sick or something? Kaz: (paying no attention, keeps hugging himself) Alas, my friends. Things go far from desired this time. For Shinra are prepared to stop them at any cost! Their technologically advanced systems have detected the rebels and they are now being chased by the alarm... In through the wagons they are running, while Jessie, with a JuJitzu move (or whatever art Michelle is doing) immobilises a guard and steals his clothes... Jessie is now dressed as a man, as are Wedge and Biggs... Wedge: You are mentioned last again, KooOOOSSAAK! Biggs: MOORF! Nothing stops our heroes as they finally jump out of the train and into their new battlefield. Cloud, Tifa and Barret are off to blow up another Mako reactor, fighting against Shinra to the end. But... what is so different about this day? Why is everything so quiet? Right as they reach the reactor, they find out... they are set up. Shinra awaited for them and they are cornered... when in he comes, President Shinra himself... Introducing mr Gen Fu... (the eight fighters of Dead or Alive clap and hiss and everyone wonders what's with them). Oh behold my anxious friends and loathe the haughtiness and nerve of the Shinra President... Admire the braveness of Bruce of AVALANCE as he talks back at him in perfect slang! And dread I say at what monster they unleash against our heroes... what manufacture of insanity they are pitted against... Cloud, our fearless _swordsman_ , _is_ using his sword and the head (literally: those spikes are _deadly_!) Barret is showering this behemoth with mean bullets while the beautiful Tifa attacks and her strikes are rewarded with mighty cracks... Lightning strikes, ice appears and oh! they succeed! They have defeated the iron beast! But it is too early for joy I fear... the ground is rumbling below the feet of our heroes... and a crack tears them apart... What is happening to poor Cloud? He hangs on the other side from a dangling brick... Mel: Cloud! Kaz: Shi...~ (then notices that as in every good movie, there is a technical party waiting below with a tent to catch him... and thinks that if Cloud falls and "dies"...) Kazuya is hanging with one hand and takes a charming look in his face as he playfully waves away...: "Au revoir!" Oh yes, my friends! He is really falling! He falls down to his death, unable to hold on... Kaz: I'm FLYYYYYY~ (meanwhile downstairs, the leader of the party) Leader: Hey guys, it's time for the X-files! Party: The X-files? Running they go, leaving the tent alone... Kaz: YIiii? IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!! (despair is written across his face!) Mel: CLOUOUOUD! Don't you dare leave me! Bruce: He couldn't hold it any longer and neither can I! Let's go! Barret carries a screaming Tifa away. She is dragged on the floor, kicking like mad... Hmm... mr Irvin? Behave at the presence of children, will you please? Bruce: Naw, don't worry. I'll take her behind that wall, see? Me: Oh, okay. Mel: Aaarrrrgggg!!!! But... while Bruce embraces the lamenting Mileena what with our restless hero? What will happen to him? Luckily, Kazuya falls on his head, which is enhanced with a sharp spike of amazing fortitude. That spike saves his life, but the same cannot be said for the unfortunate floor receiving it... those who have played the game know now how Cloud survived that fall with not a scratch... Dizzy and dazed, our hero awakes... and oh, what a vision greets his opening eyes! Blushing like her dress and pretty as a flower, she is the flower girl of Midgar... Her eyes shine in concern as she holds the hero's hand and a tender smile is across her sweet face... A smile that our brave hero cannot but respond to... Kaz: Oh, honey! (in relief) You won't believe the kind of dream I had, I was there with Bruce and Kossak and Michelle and~ Wedge: AND ROOOOOOOOCK! (spreads his arms like some kind of Hercule) Kaz: It was incredible and you know, you were there, selling flowers and we were on that stage~ Jun gapes in terror...: Honey... these are not the lines! Kaz: ...? Jun: (obvious that she's acting): Oh... you're awake! (looks at him meaningfully). Kaz: ... wait a minute. Jun? You are wearing... I can't believe it! You were wearing that stupid dress in my dream too! This is amazing! Jun: Honey, it was _no_ dream~ Stupid? Kaz: Oh, there, there! (looks with a certain kind of look at her) Why don't you take that dress off and see what we can do about it? ;) Jun: (indignantly) Honey! Kaz: Oh, allright, I get it. This is getting ridiculous. And so is your bow. What's your obsession with bows anyway? You're not a little girl anymore... Jun's lips are pressed and her angry eyes start streaming... Kaz: Ow, now! What is it again? Jun: Mmmmm...mhff... Kaz: All right, if you like wearing that bow it's fine with me but stop crying and tell me what is wrong! Jun: MHHMMMFFF! Kaz: (oh my head!) Jun... (notices audience) Audience: (vEEeeerry anGry!) Kaz: What is it that you want me to do? Tell me! Jun: Honey, if you don't want to do this, just tell me! Kaz: Okay, I don't want to do this~ Jun: WAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! But... while this sentimental, tearful dialogue is going on, bad news is on the way... Tseng Turk, (played by Sijoune of Ninja Boy, until a better option comes up) leader of the secret agency, enters the church... Tseng: Allright, what's all that noise? Who's screaming like that? Kaz: She is! (points at Jun) Jun: (dangerously) Hooonneeeyy! Kaz: Hehe... (sweatdropping) just kidding! ^_^ Tseng: I won't have another word! Arrest the troublemakers! Kaz: What? Now I get arrested, too? Watch with what impressive skills our great hero leaps like a cat and runs up the stairs, stopping to stick his tongue out~ Kaz (with his fingers in either side of his mouth): Nya, nya, nya~nyaaa, nyaa! ~instead of staying back and fight for the pride of the fair maiden... Some hero, I dare say! Oh dear! Tseng orders his three followers, Sub Zero, Reptile and Scorpion~ Scorpion: See! I'm in the play after all! ~and these villains attack the poor girl... Jun: Honey! Kaz: Eh? Jun! Get the hell up there! Scorpion: GET DOWN HERE! Audience: claps madly, hisses and cheers, while Scorpion bows with courtesy. Oh this is grim... the poor girl is cornered, circled by three mean ninja Turks... Jun: Is that so! What is this? Jun goes into a mad fury of hits and kicks, known as limit break, sending the ninjas flying... Audience: (rhythmically) Go Jun! Go Jun! Go Jun! Go Jun! Jun: And that, and that... Mileena: Hey! MY limit is beating! Stop the Greenpeace attack! Audience (ignoring Mileena): GO JUN! GO JUN! GO JUN! GO GUN! Kaz: Hey... nice looking barrels... wonder, what do they do? Jun: Drop them down, you idiot and HELP ME! Kaz: Are you _sure_? Jun: YES! Kazuya picks a barrel my friends but instead of releasing it, he stands with it on the border... and he falls along! The barrel is hitting Jun instead and both our heroes are unconscious... Audience: OOOWWW! (worried) But what will there be next? The Turks go, leaving them for dead... and maybe they are spared this time... are they? No wait... they stirr... Kazuya is getting up... Kaz: Jun? Hey Jun, are you all right? Jun: ... Kaz: Oh dear... I mean, falling from very high is nothing to me, I've been doing this all my life... but you... Jun: ... Kaz: Please Jun, don't you die on me! Jun: ... honey? Kaz: Jun!! Jun: Honey, I want to go home. Kaz: Oh Jun, you don't know how happy I am to hear you say so! I want to go home too have a shower, a coffee, a~ Jun: I want to go home to my mom!!! Jun is standing up my dear friends... and she really looks pissed! What is this going on? She is leaving our hero, who with a stunned expression gazes at her before standing up and follow her, trying to talk to her but she won't listen! Oh heavens! Will there never be an end to their problems? Will they never find the peace in their hearts?