Authorís notes: Not a song fic, the song is played in a club. Song doesnít really fit in with story. Short, spare of the moment thing. Could do with some constructive criticism please.

Disclaimer: The characters, places etc belong to Squaresoft, the song belongs to the company/singer. I own nothing.

Without You

By Purple Penguin

"SQUALL! This is insane!"

"Insane?! To find a friend, someone we both grew up with, Quistis?!"

"Seifer. Is. Dead. How many times do I have to tell you?!"

"No! You have no proof!"

She sighed. "Squall." Her voice softened. "As soon as we left that time period Lunatic Pandora sunk. There were no survivors. I think you know that really." She placed a kind hand on his shoulder.

He turned to her, his eyes full of sadness and determination.

"I have to try, Quistis, I canít just forget... Too many people died in that thing. What about Raijin and Fujin? Donít you want to know if they are alive?"

"The people on board were the enemy."

Squall shook his head instantly but she continued. "I donít think you really care about all those people, Raijin and Fujin. Why are you chasing Seifer? Why waste your time with ghosts?"

The brunette sighed. "Youíre my best friend, Quistis, but you donít know me as well as you think you do. Seifer and I were rivals but I never hated him. I tried to be close to him and he fought me all the way." Squall shrugged. "I love him, I always have but I never had the chance to tell him. I want that chance even if he still hates me, I just want to tell him."

Quistis smiled sadly for his sake.

"Will you help me, Quisty? Please?"

She honestly didnít believe Seifer had survived, but how could she say no?

"Of course. Do you want me to tell the others?"

He nodded.

The Ragnorok landed outside the small town of Lupin (Which was in Esthar region near Tearís Point)

Squall walked in a daze. His mind overloaded with hope, worry and desperation.

The town was very country-like. Most of the locals were farmers. The sun shone down on the country dirt tracks, the flower borders which were clearly well looked after and the small cobbled houses.It was very quiet, peaceful. There were no action, disturbances or monsters.

A young woman sat tending to a flower border. She looked up at Squall as he glanced around the town.

"May I help you?" She asked politely.

"Do you know anything about Lunatic Pandora?"

She flinched, eyeing him suspiciously. "Youíre not from Galbadia are you?"

He smiled reassuringly. "No, Iím just looking for someone who was on board. Did any of them make it here?"

She smiled. "Yes, three people made it here." Her smile faltered. "Unfortunately they all died from their wounded. Two have given up anyway and expected to die but the other..." She trailed off sadly. Her eyes caught sight of Squallís scar.

"He had a scar like that." She smiled wistfully.

The hope drained out of Squallís eyes instantly. He hadnít told anyone but he had been almost sure Seifer was alive. He had played this image over and over in his mind of seeing Seifer and being held by him, of feeling safe, happy and loved but Seifer was dead. The image dissolved in Squallís mind. He tried not to think about it. It hurt too much to think about what could have been. Maybe if he hadnít spend so much time trying to save Rinoa, if after the battle with Adel he had ran to Seifer instead of Rinoa then this wouldnít be happening.

"He lasted a few weeks so we buried him with our past family and friends."

"Where?" Squall managed to croak. He shut his eyes tightly to stop the tears that threatened.

"Just over that hill." She pointed. "You canít miss it. Did he mean a lot to you?"

Squall nodded.

She smiled sadly. "Are you Squall?"

The brunette frowned in confusion but nodded.

"He spoke of you. He wanted you to know that he loved you, he always did and heís sorry he couldnít tell you."

Squall really couldnít stop the tears this time but the girl didnít seem to mind. He thanked her for her help and for everything she did for Seifer.

Squall reached the top of the hill glancing at the beautiful field and the various grave stones.

He walked among them reading the names until he felt drawn to one in particular.

A plain slab of grey with writing engraved in it. It looked the same as the others but to Squall it was different.

The writing read: SEIFER ALMASY


Squall kissed his fingers and ran them over Seiferís name. "I love you too." He whispered.

He always thought what it would feel like to tell Seifer that. The warmth, the safeness and knowing that they would always be together. But now Squall felt cold, empty and miserable. The only thing that could make him feel better would be to have Seifer hold him.

"Donít cry, Squall, please."

The brunette jumped at hearing Seiferís voice. He turned to see the blonde walk towards him with a gentle smile on his face.

Squall paled, staring at him.

"Whatís the matter? You look like youíve seen a ghost." He chuckled at his own joke.

He moved very close to Squall gently stroking him cheek.

Squall gasped at the unexpected coldness of Seiferís fingers.

"Arenít you glad to see me?"

Squall put aside his fear and shock. He had wanted to be held by Seifer so he wasnít going to give up his last chance. The brunette wrapped his arms around the shoulders of the blonde.

Seifer put his arms around the waist of his Squall.

"Iím so sorry."

"Shh. Itís not your fault." Seifer stroked the hair of his would-be-lover.

"Donít leave me."

"You know I have to Squall."

"Canít you haunt me or something?"

Seifer chuckled. "Listen to me." He pulled Squall's chin up so he could look him in the eye. "You canít mourn me forever. I want you to be happy, move on and fall in love."

Squall nuzzled Seiferís shoulder. "But Iím happy now. Iíll wait for you."

"No, no. You find someone else."

"I donít want anyone else."

"You will do."

The blonde pulled away and Squall instantly felt cold even though Seiferís body was freezing, the air seemed worse.

With the same calm smile as before Seifer slowly disappeared.

All the grave stones stood overgrown forgotten except one. One was regularly tided and cared for.

A man knelt uncomfortably in front of it. It was the middle of winter and a bitterly cold wind blew around the manís shoulders.

The brunette stopped his weeding as a coughing fit took over. He struggled to breath huskily. A slight smile on his face.

The 77 year old kissed his fingers and ran them over the name: Seifer Almasy.

"60 years huh?" He smiled. "Iíve waited for you 60 years." He breathed huskily. "But it shouldnít be long now and we can be together finally. The way it should be."

The old man packed his tools and stood with some difficulty. He rubbed his scar thoughtfully.

"I love you." He whispered to the grave stone.

He could have sworn he heard his reply in the wind but maybe he just imagined it in his old age.

One new grave had been added to the grave yard. It sat beside: Seifer Almasy.

The new one read: SQUALL LEONHART





Notes: IF anyone has the words to tainted love PLEASE can you e-mail me with them. Iíll write ya a fic with whatever pairing you want.

Return to Archive