Shadows In Silence

Chapter Two

By Rain

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Seifer growled after a moment of just staring at Squall.

Squall said nothing as he stepped past Seifer and threw his book-bag on the bed. It occurred to him that he should be the one asking Seifer that question. After all, Seifer was standing inside of his bedroom.

"Yeah, fuck you, too, Squall," Seifer spat before striding past him, making sure his shoulder knocked against Squall as he went.

When the door slammed shut behind him, Squall leaned back against the bed, staring at the ceiling. What the hell was Seifer doing in his bedroom, anyway? Didn't he have a mansion tucked away somewhere? That arrogant prick would probably inherit millions when he turned eighteen.

Squall frowned as he rolled over on his side and closed his eyes. He would have to buy a new walkman soon. Instead of serving detention to get it back, Squall decided to just leave it with Mr. Morimoto. The walkman wasn't worth an hour of detention. Besides, he had a rehearsal today with Selphie, Zell, and Nida.

Nida was an old friend who lived in the next town over. He was self-assured, good-looking, and smart. But due to his love for marijuana, most of the time he wasn't all there in the head.

The band had been created six months ago. Selphie was a talented musician and when she saw the poetry Squall had scribbled in his notebook, she simply begged him to allow her to turn his poetry into lyrics. After that, she recruited Zell as a drummer, Nida as a guitarist, herself as a vocalist, and after much convincing, she got Squall to play lead guitar. Their music was a cross between punk and ska; some in the scene referred to it as skunk. Personally, Squall preferred indie over punk, but still liked them both. Zell and Nida could care less, while Selphie defended the skunk scene with her life. It came as no surprise to anyone when she said her favorite band was, Less Than Jake. Their music was raw and energetic; the type that made you want to get up and dance.

However, dancing was the last thing Squall felt like doing when his bedroom door re-opened and Edea Kramer stepped inside. She was a pretty woman with glossy-black hair and a sweet personality. The person standing behind her was anything but sweet, though. Seifer was scowling, not bothering to hide how displeased he was.

"Squall, this is your new roommate Seifer Almasy," Edea said as she motioned Seifer to step forward. "I'm sorry if it came as a shock to you to find Seifer in your bedroom. He's not a burglar. Due to unfortunate circumstances, Seifer will be staying here for a few months."

"Are there any other rooms available?" Seifer asked.

Edea shook her head. "Squall is the only boy who doesn't have a roommate."

"I wouldn't mind bunking with a girl," Seifer smirked.

Edea looked startled.

Squall grit his teeth.

"I mean, what's the difference between Squall and the girls? He looks like a girl. He acts like a girl. And if I'm not mistaken, he probably gets fucked like a girl."

"Seifer!" Edea exclaimed. "I will not have you speaking that way in my orphanage!"

Seifer just shrugged and said, "What? It's true. I saw him and his faggoty-boyfriend making out in school. I don't want to be molested during the night."

Squall was so angry, his hands were clenched into fists and he could feel his nails digging into his skin. It wasn't just the ignorance most males had about homosexual relationships. It was the fact that this was coming from Seifer, a man who continued to get negative points on his number scale.

Refusing to let Seifer know how much he pissed him off, Squall stood from the bed and stomped out of the bedroom. It took every bit of self-control to ignore Seifer's comments. As much as he wanted to punch Seifer's lights out, he refused to act like the overgrown child that Seifer was.

Squall stormed through the streets with his hands jammed into his pockets. Perhaps the band could start rehearsal early. Turning up the volume on his amp and taking out all of his aggression on his guitar sounded good right about now.

As Squall walked, the cold wind nipped at his cheeks even though the sun was still out. It was always cold in the town of Balamb, never seizing to give Squall a bad cold every few months. It was quiet and peaceful there, due to the population of only three hundred. Maple trees blossomed everywhere, and the homes were small and cottage-like. It reminded him of a movie called, "Where The Heart Is", which Selphie had forced everyone to watch one night. Luckily, he and Irvine were together at the time, so the movie wasn't all that torturous - especially since Irvine's hand had explored. . . areas which had never been explored before.

A light flush tinted Squall's cheeks at the thought of Irvine.

Even though the town was filled with kind people, there was still an ignorance that lingered in the air. In most eyes, Squall's relationship with Irvine was immoral and the work of the devil. Once Squall had come to terms with his sexuality, he learned that this was something he needed to grow used to. Thankfully, though, no one outside of school had made any unwanted retorts to him or Irvine. There were a couple of old ladies that gave him an evil look once, but that was it and Squall had ignored it. Since the town was so small, it didn't take long for news to travel. Edea hadn't treated him differently, though. Squall was certain that Edea knew of his sexual preference, but her love and warmth towards him never faltered.

"FREAK!" someone yelled as a car zoomed past Squall.

Squall stopped walking and something hard hit him on the back of his leg. He looked down and found an empty soda can roll across the pavement. Then he looked back towards the red car that was speeding down the narrow street and scowled.

Freak. Faggot. Those were two things Squall needed to grow used to. At least the 'freak' name would be dropped after high school. He doubted anyone would be as immature as they were in school. Then again, there were still a handful of idiots that would never get over their immaturity, even after they were old and married.

Squall snorted in disgust and continued walking.

After a few minutes, Selphie's house came into view - there was no mistaking it. A white-picket fence circled around the house; green grass covered the lawn; the house was painted white with a blue roof; and sheer curtains covered the large, squared windows. It was a picture perfect house for an old sitcom about family life, where the father was a hard worker, the mother was a loving wife, and the children were straight-A students who never talked back.

Shoving his hands into the pockets of his pants, Squall moved towards the back of the house. Their rehearsals took place in a soundproof basement, which Selphie's father had set up for them. Although Selphie would never admit it, nor act like it, she came from a wealthy family that spoiled their daughter rotten. Squall always felt uncomfortable around Selphie's family, mostly because he was unfamiliar about a mother and fathers love for their child.

"Hey, Squall! You're early!" Selphie said, emerging from the basement door with a smile on her face. "I was about to get some drinks. Want anything?"

Squall shook his head and entered the basement.

Immediately, the smell of pot and cigarettes filled his nostrils. The dull lighting in the basement illuminated the two forms seated on a worn out couch underneath a small window. Nida and Zell were seated on the couch, smoking a bowl from a large, purple pipe. Squall frowned and turned on a nearby fan, hoping to oscillate the smoke in the room.

"You're early," Nida drawled, holding the smoke in his lungs as he took notice of Squall.

Squall offered no reply and sat down on the opposite side of Zell and Nida, reaching for his guitar and tuning it.

"You should've called first," Zell said, "We would've smoked this outside."

Both Nida and Zell were aware that the smell of cigarettes and pot bothered Squall. Out of everyone in the group, Squall was the only one who was straight edge - meaning, he didn't smoke, drink, or do any drugs.

Again, Squall said nothing and continued to tune his guitar by ear.

A few minutes later, Selphie re-entered holding three sodas in her hand. She tossed two of the cans towards Zell and Nida, wrinkling her nose and saying, "If my dad comes down here and catches you two. . ." she trailed off with a shake of her head, taking a seat next to Squall on the loveseat.

"What brings you here so early?" she asked. "You didn't have a fight with Irvine, did you?"

". . . No," Squall answered quietly.

"Then what?" she opened her soda with a loud 'pop' and took a sip as she studied Squall.

"Nothing," Squall said with a note of irritation in his voice.

Selphie sighed and decided to drop the subject, knowing that she wouldn't get a word out of Squall.

"Oh yeah!" Selphie exclaimed suddenly. "We have a gig at seventeen thirty nine on Saturday!" [1]

"Are we gonna get paid?" Nida asked.

Selphie scowled and said, "It's not about money, you dork."

"I was just kidding," Nida chuckled, "but, you know, there's going to be a bunch of newbies at the show."

"Yeah," Selphie sighed, frowning. Ever since punk rock had gone mainstream, little girls who looked up to Avril Lavigne started showing up. It wouldn't have been so bad if Avril actually knew what punk rock was about, but that wasn't the case. Her songs didn't even make sense.

"He was a skater boy, she said see you later boy!" Zell sang in a high and irritating voice. "He wasn't good enough for her! She had a pretty face, but her head was up in space!"

"She needs to check her own head," Selphie muttered. "Anyway, we have to get to the club early. The show starts at six, so we have to get there at around five. The other bands don't own their own equipment, so they're going to be using ours." [2]

"Who's playing?" Nida asked.

"Um," Selphie tapped her chin with her finger, "a couple of bands I'm not familiar with. . ."

"We should start practicing, then - since Squall got here earlier than usual," said Zell.

Squall scowled at Zell and unconsciously pouted.

Now that he and Seifer were roommates, Squall had a feeling he wouldn't be spending a lot of time at home.

A few hours later, Squall settled down against Irvine's bed, sighing. He had headed to Irvine's house after rehearsal, refusing to go home to see the annoying blond. He couldn't understand why Seifer got on his nerves the way he did. Usually, if he found someone annoying, he could easily block them out and pretend that they didn't exist, but Seifer seemed to make sure that Squall was unable to forget him - unconsciously or not unconsciously. It didn't really matter, since either way, Seifer annoyed him.

"What's wrong?" Irvine asked, moving on the bed behind Squall and wrapping his arms around him. "You've been moody ever since lunch time."

Squall sighed, refusing to talk about it. He didn't want to burden Irvine with his problems; he could take care of himself.

"I'm going to get you to confess to me one day," Irvine murmured as he nuzzled Squall's neck with his nose.

Shivers traveled down Squall's spine as Irvine breathed against his throat, blowing warm air across his heated skin. His longhaired lover could always make him feel good by the slightest touches. While they hadn't gone all the way, they had shared mutual lust and passion.

Squall tilted his head to the side, allowing Irvine to press their lips together. He almost melted against the feel of Irvine against him, holding him close and kissing him softly. There was no better feeling than being held by your lover, someone who would stand by your side no matter what. In their moments of time together, the outside world faded away, sealing them in a tight embrace where only love and kindness dwelled. For a long time, Squall lacked the two emotions, but Irvine was slowly bringing him out of his shell.

"Irvine," Squall gasped, breaking the kiss as a moan rumbled in his throat.

A hand had slipped beneath Squall's shirt, gently raking dull fingernails against his stomach. Squall threw his head back and hissed, feeling himself become aroused as the fingers drifted lower. Once they reached the waistband of his pants, there was a knock on Irvine's door and the two boys flew a part.

"Irvine! You'd better be studying!" Mrs. Kinneas called through the wooden door.

Irvine growled and said, "I am! Go away!"

"Go away?! Is that any way to talk to your mother?!"

"I'm sorry, mother! Please go away!"

There was a loud sigh behind the door, and then the sound of footsteps walking away.

". . . You should be nicer to your mom," Squall said quietly.

Irvine snorted. "Do you think she'd be nice to you if she caught you in here?"

Squall managed to hide his wince and looked away.

Once word had gotten around that he and Irvine were seeing each other, Irvine's mother forbid him to see Squall. While it had hurt that Irvine's parents didn't approve of their relationship, Squall didn't blame them. Why would they want their son to see a boy like him? Even if he was a girl, they still wouldn't have wanted Squall to date their only son. Who would want someone like him around?

"I should go." Squall stood from the bed and headed towards the squared window, avoiding eye contact with his boyfriend.

"You just got here," Irvine protested.

"You have to study," Squall said quietly. "Your mom might catch onto our relationship if your grades start falling. . ."

"Why would she connect the two?"

'Because I'm a bad influence,' Squall said to himself.

"Edea might become worried, too," Squall said, "I headed here right after rehearsal."

Irvine sighed and stood from the bed, closing the distance between him and Squall in two strides. He brought Squall into a tight hug, just holding him tightly for a long moment.

"I'm sorry," he whispered against Squall's ear.

". . . It's ok," Squall said, "I have to go."

Irvine stepped back and nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yeah. . ." Squall turned around and climbed out of the window, grateful that Irvine's room was on the first floor. After a backwards glance at his longhaired boyfriend, Squall wrapped his arms around himself and headed back to the orphanage.

". . . What the. . ." Squall stared at his bedroom in shock, unable to process any other words.

Seifer was seated at his desk and he turned around to stare at Squall, who stood unmoving in the doorway.

"You dug out, so somebody had to move all your shit," Seifer said with a shrug. "Judging by your inattentiveness in class, I figured you didn't use this desk, so I claimed it."

Squall felt his shock slowly ebb away into anger.

All of his CD's, books, drawings, and clothing was scattered across the wooden floor, thrown out of place from where they had been properly organized.

"That piece of shit dresser didn't hold all of my clothes, and I figured since you didn't wash your clothes, it didn't really have to sit in your dresser," said Seifer.

". . . You - You!!!" No words could describe the rage Squall was feeling inside. He was glad he was able to keep his face impassive, but Seifer had drawn the last straw. Who the hell did he think he was? Those were his belongings thrown carelessly across the room, as if it meant nothing at all! Did he realize that most of his clothes had been given to him by Irvine, since the orphanage couldn't afford to buy him such things? Did he realize that that meant it was extra special to him because Irvine gave it to him?! Maybe it wasn't new, but it was the thought that counted! And it wasn't like Squall was about to complain! It was either that or wearing the same damn clothes every day!

And there sat Seifer, tapping away at a brand new laptop in his Ralph Lauren, blue silk robe! The bed that Squall had used for years was now covered in - what he could only assume - thousand-dollar bed sheets, while the light blue cotton sheets Edea had gave him was thrown over a forest green cot!

Squall launched himself at the blond-devil-from-hell and tried to punch and kick at the larger man. Red, hot anger surged through his veins, spurring him on to keep kicking and punching whatever his fist or foot could connect with.

'What the hell is his problem?!' Squall thought wildly as anger overrode all his senses. He could barely feel Seifer fighting back; he was too numb with anger.

"Squall! Squall! What are you doing?! Stop it!" Edea cried as she rushed into the room, where she had been alarmed by the banging noises and loud grunts. "Get a hold of yourself, Squall!"

"YOU STUPID ASSHOLE!" Squall shouted at the top of his lungs, for perhaps the first time in his life. "GET OUT!!!"

"Squall! Calm down!" Edea wrapped her arms tightly around Squall's shoulders, trying to pull him away from Seifer.

Seifer watched Squall in amusement, pleased that he had sparked such a reaction out of the ice sculpture. While Squall had been out, Edea tried to explain to him about the kind of person Squall was. And from what Seifer had heard, screaming was something Squall Leonhart didn't do; nor did he lose self-control. He must've really pushed his buttons.

"Seifer, please, go down to the living room," Edea said, "give Squall some time to calm down."

Seifer shrugged and flicked Squall's forehead with his finger before leaving, just to set him off even more.

'Maybe now that fucker won't ignore me,' Seifer thought as he strolled down the hallway.

If there was one thing Seifer Almasy hated, it was being ignored.


To be continued. . .


[1] 1739 Kalakaua Avenue - If you're ever in Hawaii and you want to check out the local punk bands, you should check out this teeny club. I've wasted a lot of weekends there. ^^;;

[2] Setting up and packing up shows is soooo not fun. -_-; Especially when your car is parked five million miles away, and you're a little girl carrying a huge speaker in your tiny hands. -_-;

AN: There is something about this fic that I don't like. Until I figure out what to do with it,

I'm putting it on hold. I'm sorry if this captured anyone's interest. I'll try to finish and update this fic quickly, but I can't make any promises. I just. . . really don't like it. ^^;; I'm thinking about re-writing it.

If you want to be notified of my fic updates - so that you don't have to keep checking if this is updated - just join my ML: 

I'm sorry once again if I've disappointed anyone.

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