Note: All characters depicted belong to Square. They aren't mine, and neither is the song. That belongs to the god Morissey and the Smiths. Please don't sue me. It does contain shounen-ai, but nothing overly dirty. The theory stated is mine however. Thank youand enjoy!

How Soon is Now?

By Domino
(Lyrics by Morissey)

Welcome to the team....  That's what you tell me now.  You have no idea who I am, do you?  I guess it's for the best, since the cause we're fighting for goes against my very heritage.  What am I talkin' about?  You'd better sit down.

 

I am the son
And the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son and heir
Of nothing in particular

 

Sure, I'm a sniper.  I'm the only one in the three Gardens. But I hate being one sometimes.  I get so damn lonely.  What about my heritage?  I'm gettin' to that.  You wanted to find out more about me, right?  So I suggest you be patient.  I'm Galbadia's best sharpshooter, but then again I was raised that way.  Headmaster Martine adopted me when I was a kid.  He's been my father and my teacher.  When I was a pre-teen he told me about my mother.  This is the reason I am the way I am.

 

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way ?
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

 

He said my mother was a benevolent sorceress turned insane by her own powers.  My father was a Galbadian soldier killed in her rampage.  She took over Esthar, ruling it with an iron fist.  That look on your face tells me you've figured it out.  Yeah, my mom's the Sorceress Adel.  I bet I know what you're thinkin' too.  Does this guy work for her?  Is he an infiltrator?  My answer is no.  I came with you guys to help out, as per my orders.  Give me some credit. Am I that repulsive to you already?  I guess not since you haven't slit my throat yet.

 

I am the son
And the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son and heir
Oh, of nothing in particular

 

You still don't believe me.  I have my mom's eyes, her hair, and her complexion.  The rest is my dad.  Yes, this technically makes me Irvine Kinneas, the prince of Esthar.  But I'm in no rush to reclaim my throne.  From what I hear the current president is doing a bang-up job.  Plus I'm not the type of guy who would WANT to rule an entire country.  I'm just a kid, for gods sakes!  I'm the kid of a vicious sorceress, yes, but a kid nonetheless.

 

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way ?
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

 

I'm suprised with you, man.  You're still here, yet that look on your face tells me you want me to drop dead right now.  Well, that ain't gonna happen.  For the first time in my life I feel like I belong somewhere.  Even in Galbadia no one really liked me. It's almost as if they knew who I was.  It's sad, not feeling liked by your own peers.  Hell, even my adoptive dad Martine wasn't too fond of me, despite beinga role model for me.  That's a story within itself.

 

There's a club, if you'd like to go
You could meet somebody who really loves you
So you go, and you stand on your own
And you leave on your own
And you go home, and you cry
And you want to die

 

Well, Martine never liked me for two reasons: one, my mother Adel, and two, he found out my sexuality.  That's right, I'm gay.  I went out with someone who was willing to accept me, and what happened?  "DAD" caught me in bed with him.  We were only making out, and I was clothed... well, mostly, but the way he acted...  He threw the boy out, and for the first time he slapped me.  That really hurt... for someone to love you like that and then hit you.

I never spoke to the boy again, though I knew I could've had something with him.  The way I was touched.... I craved it, but refused to become a slut.  Ironic, huh?  I act like one around the girls, but in reality I'm a big prude.  Ever since then I couldn't bring myself to date anyone, and the facts spreading about my mom made me even more unpopular.  Not that I cared, but I did get lonely.  Martine didn't care, I knew that, but I was afraid of what he might do to me if I did decide to start dating again.  To this day it hurts...

 

When you say it's gonna happen "now"
Well, when exactly do you mean ?
See I've already waited too long
And all my hope is gone

 

Don't give me that.  I'm not into all of that "oh, you'll find someone someday".  Bullshit.  I'm too fucking scared, okay? I'm scared of what people will think if they see me with another man. The one for me is gone.  The boy who touched me... the one who put me on a pedestal.....  I'm scared of betraying his memory also. What did you just say...?

 

You shut your mouth
How can you say
I go about things the wrong way ?
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does

 

You're.... serious?  Are you sure?  I wasn't expecting that coming from the likes of you.  No, I didn't mean it like that, it's just.. I didn't picture you as the type to ask me out.  Then again, you did listen to me and blow off the fact that I'm Adel's little boy.  Thanks Squall.... at least you're willing to take it slow.... but please, my wounds do need time.  At least I know you're willing to help them heal.

~Fin~

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