Enigmatic Hatred

Part 6

By Shade

Seifer’s dorm was not quite SeeD standards and reminded Squall of his own student dorm days. A small bed, ratty chair in the main room in front of a television, and a small, hotel-sized fridge with a microwave sitting on top of it. Given of course Squall’s dorm had been a bit more orderly though now he could care less. He had spent the entire morning in bed trying to get down a glass of orange juice Seifer had brought him that morning. He ended up vomiting once more that morning and more teasing from the blonde ensued. Now it was around noon.

“Think you can get down lunch?” Squall opened his eyes to find the blonde at his bedside.

“Mmm,” he was hungry but afraid of throwing it up again. He had never had a hangover before and he wasn’t enjoying this first experience either “I can try, what is there?”

Seifer looked over his shoulder as though he could see the contents of the mini fridge from there “Chicken flavored Ramen okay?”

Squall groaned.

“Hey, I didn’t insult your cooking,” Seifer frowned and crossed his arms in an annoyed manner.

“It’s fine,” the brunnete sighed and moments after Seifer had stepped away, tried to stand. Slowly and quite wobbly he made his way to the larger room and sank down in the ratty chair. From here he could see Seifer taking two packets from above a clutter of towels in the closet. Squall looked away from Seifer and towards the television. He could hear yelling which signified a talk show playing but the screen was only a single white line across the middle “Hey, Seifer-”

“Huh?” Seifer had just filled one bowl with water and was emptying the flavor packet over the noodles when he looked over his shoulder to find Squall in the chair. He caught sight of the television “Oh,” casually he took a step, reached out, and banged his fist down on top of the television. Immediately the picture expanded and a man in lingerie and his wife appeared, arguing on the screen.

It wasn’t long after the man began leaping and frolicking through the audience that Seifer’s voice caught his attention “Hot!” the blonde was juggling a hot bowl which he quickly placed atop the television before retreating to the bedroom. Soon he returned with a blue sham which he threw to Squall “Use this,” he said blowing a bit at his fingertips before taking the bowl from the television top and putting it on the pillow.

Squall began eating slowly and was getting into the talk show playing before him when Seifer returned with his own bowl and took a seat on the floor beside the chair “Keeping that down okay?” he asked settling his own bowl so that it wouldn’t burn him.

Squall slurped a noodle without noticing “Yeah,” he wished Seifer hadn’t mentioned that. He was trying to forget about how sick he felt.

To his relief, the rest of the meal was finished out in silence. They watched the talk show, amused by the literal dregs of the earth this program had managed to find. When Squall finally finished the noodles he put the pillow aside and stood from the chair. No sooner had he stood then the throbbing in his head worsened and he swayed at the sudden pain.

Seifer, who had finished his own lunch ages ago was on his feet quickly “Watch it,” he warned, catching the brunette by the shoulders and lowering him back into the chair “Here,” he took the bowl from Squall and gathering his own crossed the room where he threw both, carelessly, into the sink “You really shouldn’t drink,” Seifer with a half smile said looking him over.

“I didn’t mean to!” Squall snapped, throwing an arm over his face. He hadn’t meant to yell but had and Seifer was none too pleased.

“Relax a won’t you?”

Squall pulled his arm back down and stood once more, making his way slowly to the bathroom, holding walls for support.

“Don’t tell me you’re going to-”

“No,” Squall said just as angrily “I’m going to get this bad taste out of my mouth. Do you have an extra toothbrush?”

“Try under the sink,” Seifer said, glancing in distaste at a daytime soap opera now beginning. Sure that there was nothing else to watch he pressed the off button.

Squall in the meantime was seated on the floor, shifting through the mass under the sink. Weapon magazines, cleaner, baby oil, shampoo, soap, CDs...CDs...? Seifer needed to organize. Finally he found an unopened toothbrush near the bottom. Standing he took toothpaste from beside a second toothbrush and opened the toothbrush box.

Seifer appeared in the mirror behind him, glancing down at the items scattered on the floor “Thanks for that,” he disappeared for a moment then unintentionally gave Squall a start when he reappeared from the floor with a bottle “Come on,” he said simply.

“Where?” Squall spat into the sink and rinsed out his mouth, another pang in his temple telling him he needed to sit down.

“The bed,”

Squall’s eyes widened “I-I’m in no shape to go to-”

“Not for that,” Seifer took Squall’s elbow and began to lead him toward the bed.

Squall tried to think over what he could possibly have in mind and then smiled in amused realization “I get a massage don’t I. I didn’t know Seifer Almasy gave messages.”

“I don’t,” Seifer frowned slightly embarrassed by the concept as Squall sat on the end of the bed “Look, just take off your shirt and shut up.”

“Oh, aren’t we romantic?” Squall said sarcastically though still smiling, something rare for him “No thanks.”

“Look,” Seifer sighed “You’re heads ‘killing you’ isn’t it? You can’t tell me a massage isn’t what you want right now...I don’t do this often and I don’t plan to make a habit of it so just admit it...”

Squall, who had been standing again nodded “Okay, you’re right,” slowly, so as not to provoke another surge of pain, Squall removed his shirt and then looked back to Seifer. The blonde’s mind was clearly not on that massage at the moment. Squall blushed furiously “Seifer!” he hissed, facing his back to him “don’t stare at me like that,” Squall said under his breath, though it was still meant to be plainly heard.

“-Oh,” Seifer shook his head “Sorry,” Seifer sat on the bed and waited for Squall to do the same. After a few hesitative moments the smaller man sat at the edge of the bed “I think you can lye down Squall.”

“Oh,” Squall blushed again and stretched horizontally out across the bed, folding his arms under his chin. He watched the wall, still slightly on edge. It took him offgaurd when something cold touched his skin, something he soon identified as the baby oil from the recesses of the sink cabinet. Soon after this he felt a pair of hands touched between his shoulder blades and then-”Ah,” Squall let his eyes drift from the wall and shut, any tension he had felt before about relaxing on the bed gone and the effects of hangover ebbing away.

At what Squall guessed was about a half hour later, he found himself drifting in and out of consciousness and truly thankful that Seifer had offered to do this. It was surprising that he would do something like this even after-oh yeah. Squall came to full consciousness and again opened his eyes “I’m sorry about the night before last,”

“Hmm, oh,” Seifer’s voice seemed to be taken offgaurd by the sudden speech “I think we’re about even,” he said and Squall could just picture a smirk on his face.

“Almost?” he repeated thoughtfully.

“Mmm hmm, you still have to make it up to me.” Seifer stopped rubbing Squall’s back at that point and slowly the brunette straightened.

“What did you have in mind?” Squall asked a bit nervously though he couldn’t hide a slight smile.

Seifer didn’t answer. Instead he simply returned the smile and stood from the bed. Bending over he picked up Squall’s shirt and reluctantly offered it to him.

“No,“ Squall motioned him to hang onto it for the moment “I think I’m going to take a shower.”

Seifer quirked a brow and Squall gave him a playful, warning look “A shower alone.”

Squall removed unbuttoned his pants absently. Surely he wasn’t in love but it was clear to him that he could easily fall for the blonde in the next room. Before now Squall hadn’t thought it was likely that he could love another man...but now...Squall folded his pants carefully and placed them on the toilet seat. Holding back the curtain he swiveled the knob for hot water and waited until hot water was coming out of the faucet before pulling up the stopper and stepping into the shower spray.

He let the water rush over him at first, ignoring the clouds of steam that were forming from the hot water an cherishing the warmth. He stood like this for several moments before hearing the bathroom door open “I told you I was taking a shower alone,” Squall pulled the curtain tight.

“I didn’t come in here for that, you forgot a towel,” there was pause “...of course...now that you mention it.”

“Don’t-” Squall grabbed the curtain just as Seifer pretended to start and pull it back Squall felt his cheeks grow hotter than the water as Seifer watched the drenched face sticking out of the curtain. Squall didn’t object when the blonde but his hand under damp chin and tilted it so that he could kiss his lips. Squall felt his grip on the curtain slipping as he leaned further into the kiss. At last he had let go completely and had to think a moment on the reason as to why Seifer had stopped kissing him. Then he realized it. “Oh,” Squall tried to cover himself up, blushing worse than ever.

“Why are you embarrassed?”

Squall opened his eyes to again find Seifer only inches away from his own face. Squall tried to look away.

“You’re beautiful,” Seifer said with another characteristic smirk, leaning in for a second kiss.

Squall lowered his hands, raising them so that they could rest on Seifer’s shoulders Squall’s head tipped to the side as the lips at his own lowered themselves down his neck and then to his shoulder. Eyes closed Squall didn’t posses a negative thought when Seifer asked “May I come in?” Squall only nodded, moving back against the wall of the shower as Seifer stepped in beside him.

Squall’s eyes opened and he smiled “You’re still dressed,” he said looking over the black shirt and jeans.

“Not for long,” Seifer teased, returning the smile as the red returned to Squall’s face. He pulled the curtain shut and pulled Squall in front of him as he moved to the front of the shower “I love you,” the blonde whispered before again starting at Squall’s lips.

“Mmm,” Squall leaned in as he felt Seifer’s tongue at his own. Squall lowered his hands to Seifer’s waist and allowed his fingers to slip under the tight black shirt and against the skin. Slowly he worked the fabric up, leaning his head back to breath as he eased the shirt over Seifer’s head and dropped it to the floor of the shower “Seifer,” he sighed, resting his hands on the blonde’s arms and kissing away the drops of water forming under the faucet spray at Seifer’s chest.

Seifer moved the brunette backwards and pinned him against the back of the shower so that he was at the taller man’s level. One hand against the shower wall he put his mouth at Squall’s neck and pressed his hips close against his.

“Oh,” a surge of pleasure rushed through Squall and again he arched his neck.

Seifer smiled and pulled back a bit, raising his lips to be level with Squall’s ear “I think we’re even,” he whispered.

“No,” Squall said without thinking, lowering his hands “I don’t want to be even, not yet.”

It was Seifer who was suprised this time. Squall was working at the fastenings of his pants, fumbling at the work in his haste. Quickly enough Squall had succeeded.. It was Seifer who closed his eyes for what came next.


Both of the males gave a start at the sudden sound. Seifer pulled back in surprise and Squall dropped to the shower floor from where he had been pinned.

“Agh!” Seifer cursed under his breath and quickly pulled his own pants up, which were significantly tighter than they had been only minutes before. Rushing he tore out the door and across the room then flung open the door angrily. “What!” he demanded but a second later whished he hadn’t yelled. Rinoa and Ellone stood taken aback before him “Oh, sorry.”

“Where’s Squall?” Rinoa asked looking around Seifer in hopes of a glimpse of her boyfriend.

“Ah, taking a shower,” Seifer said. The water was indeed still running though he had a sneaking suspicion that Squall had started running cold water for obvious reasons.

“Oh, why are you so wet?” Rinoa asked eyeing his soaked jeans.

“I-” Seifer glanced nervously at Ellone who was also staring at the jeans but in an entirely different area. Did she know? “I took a shower before him, I guess I’m still kinda wet.”

“Okay,” Rinoa looked at Ellone. “Well we were just coming to check up on Squall. Send him back over when he’s out okay?”

“Sure,” Seifer nodded to Rinoa who was shifting to leave and then to Ellone who lingered a little longer “I’ll send him over,” he repeated to the unmoving female. Hesitantly she moved away with Rinoa.

When he was sure they were on their way to their own dorm, Seifer closed the door and hurried back across the room. Seifer appeared from the bathroom wearing pants again “What happened?” he demanded. Obviously Squall had recognized the voice.

“Squall,” Seifer began slowly “I think your sister knows.”

“God,” Squall closed his eyes and put his hand against his forehead.

Seifer frowned “Is it that embarrassing?” he asked “Can’t you just tell them the truth now.”

“It’s not that I-I mean,” Squall lowered his hand and his eyes widened apologetically “It’s not that I’m embarrassed-ah-I mean, I just can’t. Not yet.”

“You are embarrassed,” Seifer corrected angrily “What would the Garden think if they found out not only is their star SeeD gay but also seeing Seifer Almasy, the traitor!”

“Seifer!” Squall didn’t know how to apologize. Wrapping his arms around Seifer he rested his head on his chest “Please, not another fight. I don’t want to fight with you again.”

Seifer sighed and pulled Squall back “I’m not going to start another fight...but I want you out...”

Squall tried to hide the fact that his eyes had teared up. “Okay,” standing on tip toe he placed a quick kiss upon Seifer’s lips and started towards the door “I-I’ll see you tomorrow,” with that he gathered his shirt and jacket and rushed from the dorm.

It was several hours later but Seifer had hardly moved. He was currently lying on his side upon the bed. “What are you doing?” he asked himself, furious he was showing an old repressed emotion. Seifer felt his breath catch and swallowed hard to prevent himself from doing anything more. Closing his eyes he attempted to sleep.


Again? Seifer stood and crossed the room to answer the door. He was half hoping to see Squall but instead-

“May I come in?”

It was Ellone “Sure,” he said stepping aside and allowing Ellone to enter before he closed the door completely “What is it?” he had never been and was definitely no in the mood now, to be a good host.

Ellone took a deep breath “I want to talk to you,” she said simply.

“About what?” Seifer’s voice sounded a bit lazy. He really didn’t want this new visitor.

“What are you doing with my brother!” the tone in Ellone’s voice made Seifer jump. The woman had faced Seifer, her face almost even with his, and her eyes narrowed.

Seifer stood there a moment but quickly enough words found him “Why don’t you ask him because I have no idea!” Seifer returned the stern look and began to walk back to his bedroom. She could let herself out.

Ellone’s expression softened slightly “You’re not taking advantage of him are you?” she had to make sure.

“Hell, no,” Seifer snapped angrily, stopping in the door frame and looking back.

“So he just isn’t talking about you,” she walked after him a few steps when Seifer didn’t answer. Taking the last moment of silence as a yes she continued “But you-you’re having-ah-”

“Sex?” Seifer asked. His expression hadn’t changed and Ellone blushed as her brother might at the mention of the word “No, not yet.”

“But you are-”

Seifer took a few steps to meet her “Do I love him? Yes! Does he love me? No! Does he lead me on anyway? Yes! Does he plan on ever telling anyone? No!”

Ellone stood a tad shocked at the outburst and then nodded “I see,” she lowered her eyes slightly “I’m sorry for amusing that you-well you know. I guess I just feared the worse.”

Seifer eyed her suspiciously. “It doesn’t bother you then?”

The woman paused once more “I guess it caught me off guard...and I can’t say I ever expected this but...” she looked up towards Seifer “I respect my brother’s decisions...though I’m not particularly proud of how he’s dealing with you...”

Seifer looked away this time, afraid he would do something he would regret.

Ellone obviously noticed and nodded farewell “Good luck Seifer. I won’t say anything about this to Squall,” Ellone opened the door and then as an afterthought added “he needs to think this over on his own.”

The door closed and Seifer was again alone. His breath caught again “Shit,” he muttered, raising a hand to his eyes and shaking his head “No,” repressing the emotion yet again he made his way back to his bed.



A/N: I think I need to up the rating. o.o. Believe I will. I hope this chapter isn’t as odd as I thought it was either. By the way, if you thought Seifer’s home sounded horribly shabby I based it on where I live ^-^;. No making fun of it now, thank you. Well mores coming soon as well as those promised character death(s). - sorry, had to put a teaser in for Alexiel -. Please keep reviewing.

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