Warnings: Angst (very small), Omi's POV (most of it), OOC (?), Lemon.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Weiß boys so don't sue me. ^-^0
Author's Notes: I suck at endings!!! O.o I need to go to ending school.
Keeping The Secret
By Kurashi Tokiyama
I lay here and think about what we do. My feelings reflect and I think about them over and over, forming them into something far worse each time I think about it. Or maybe it's the truth...maybe we are killers...maybe we deserve to die just as much as the people we kill. All it takes is one mistake...one bad move...one incident of being in the wrong place at the wrong time and you could be hated forever...gunned down by someone you don't know who was hired by the step-brother's wife's cousin to kill you for killing their cousin's husband's step-brother. But. There are those that need punishing, those that do it just for hate and they do it over and over. Yes those that fill us with vengeance. Those that make opening my eyes to look into theirs meaningful before I spill their blood. Getting wounds from them infuriates me and makes me think that I am tasting a little of what their last victim felt..it drives me and inspires me to new ideas of death for them.
The door opens slowly and I watch as Ken walks into the room and lies on his bed beside of me. I smile sadly at him and wonder what he is thinking of; he looks awfully tired. Suddenly I wonder what he would think if he could read my mind and see what I was thinking. I know he probably thinks the same things...of course he does, we all have to go through these things every night. Why wouldn't he think of those people? The evil ones, the victims, the families of the victims...and ourselves. I know he thinks of us; he tells me so from time to time. Just little hints of guilt that he reveals. He is so much like me. I don't think I've ever noticed how much alike we are. In comparing myself to him, we look nothing alike and our backgrounds are nothing alike but we share the same feelings...about Weiß.
I look over to him; he stirs. He has turned onto his side and is now looking at me with an intense gaze. I stare back. No one moves for a couple minutes until he gets up and comes over to me and lies on my bed next to me. My eyes drift to his and his are serious. "Omi." He stares at me for a couple more seconds to make sure that I don't respond and then he leans to me, his face mere centimeters from mine and he stops there and whispers my name again, expecting me to run away from him, disgusted. I know why he wants this from me...no...with me. He's asking me to love him...not just once. I allow my eyes to soften and my expression change to a weak smile to show him my answer. He looks as if he is going to cry for a moment and he pulls me into a hug and holds me tight against him as if he were keeping me from falling. I nuzzle his neck and wrap my arms around him, allowing myself to be comforted by his presence and the fact that we are going to be together...at least for a little while. We sit there on the bed in each other's arms, Ken rocking me back and forth as I cling to his shirt.
I can't stop the feelings from flooding forth as I think of what Ken is actually doing for me right now. My eyes fill with tears against his shoulder as realization creeps into my senses. He is providing an element of my life that has been missing for so long that I can't even remember what it was like to have it in the first place. He's filling my once-thought-irreplaceable void with comfort and love. And now I feel all I ever want to do is be here, in his arms, forever. I feel my tears slide down my face and toward his shoulder and gasp against him as they hit his shoulder, my body now trembling with my sobbing.
He feels it on his shoulder and only holds me closer, now running his hand through my hair and holding my head to him, whispering to me comforting words as he rocks me slowly as if I were a baby. It is unbelievably comforting to be held this way by him and I tighten my arms around him and pour my heart's tears out on his shoulder. I feel all of my emotions seeping out of me; my hate, my sadness, and regret; and feel it being replaced by Ken's love and caring for me. And suddenly, that is all that exists. He holds me until I stop crying and even after to make sure I won't start again and he gently pulls me away from him and he looks into my eyes. He strokes my cheeks with his thumbs, wiping away the remaining traces of my tears. He smiles to me and kisses my forehead and then he moves down to my lips, never removing his hands from my face. The kiss is gentle; my eyes slide closed and his thumbs stroke my face gently as he moves his lips against mine. His lips are so soft and loving against mine, I want him to hold me and kiss me forever this way. It seems so perfect that I open my mouth slightly, inviting him to open his also and let his tongue come into my mouth. I feel his hands move into my hair as he opens his mouth to mine and slips his tongue inside to press and move against mine.
I don't know why but I begin to cry again as Ken kisses me. He notices and pulls away from my lips and smiles to me, closing his eyes and kissing away my tears, whispering to me. "There is no need to cry anymore Omi...I am here, and I'll be with you forever now. Shh...shh..." He cradles me again, sitting up with me and holding me to his chest, continuing to show me how much he cares about me. I smile and fist a hand in the front of his shirt. I'm afraid. Afraid I'll wake up from this wonderful dream to the world with nothing again. Afraid someone will take him away from me if it isn't a dream. Afraid that he'll be...killed on a mission.
He gently reminds me that it isn't a dream and all that isn't going to happen with a hand sliding up my bare back. Somehow he has gotten my shirt off of me without me noticing. It feels so good, his hand stroking my back while he still holds me. I sigh blissfully and lean into his chest, nuzzling it. He moves me onto my back and he poises himself above me, and occupies himself with kissing me wherever he can, mainly on my face. His hand stayed on my back and his other hand is now in my hair, stroking it as he kisses my lips. I can only smile as he moves his lips down my neck and chest, spreading his love all over my body. I am so relaxed that I feel as if I'm under the influence of some drug. I think it's only that I'm so happy. He fingers the rim of my pants and looks up at me. I smile at his sweetness of actually asking and nod. He lifts my hips and slides them off of me, smiling when he finds no underwear beneath.
Once all of my skin is bare he crawls back up to my face. He smiles down at me, brushing my bangs gently out of my face. He tells me how happy he is, and how lucky and fortunate. He kisses me again and this time I hold him to me, feeling the warmth of his body against mine. He makes a little sound and pulls away from my shoulder, and in feeling his erection brush my thigh I understand why and chuckle, pulling him down into a kiss. "Ken-kun..." He kisses my cheek and supports his weight with one hand while he searches his pocket for something and pulls out a tube, laying it on the bed beside of me. He crawls off of me enough to take off his clothes and watch me as he does. I can only guess he's looking for a good expression, but all I can do is stare at his body. He takes off his shirt revealing a stomach and chest like mine, though his waist is a bit smaller than mine. Then he slides down his pants showing me his long legs. And then...his boxers drop to the floor and I blush, immediately looking back up to his face, never having seen anything like that before in my life. He was bigger than me, and it impressed me. I beckon for him to come back down on me and he smiles, fulfilling my request happily. He begins to kiss me again and of course I do not notice that his hands are no longer on me because his lips are working their magic on me. I feel his hand on my thigh, slowly pushing it outward and spreading my legs apart slowly. His lips move to my neck and I gasp as the hand that pushed my legs apart finds my cock and one of his fingers from the other hand finds my hole and rubs around it. I can't stop myself from moaning his name as he strokes me and starts to slide his finger into me, still kissing my neck.
"Omi...have you ever done this before?" He whispers gently into my ear, nibbling on my neck again afterward. My mouth is open and I barely manage to choke out a "no" between gasps of pleasure. What Ken is putting me through is all new to me. My body is doing things that I can't control; my heart is beating wildly, my hips are lifting to Ken's touch, my lungs don't seem to cooperate, and I'm practically glowing with pleasure...until Ken slips the second finger inside of me.
I freeze in pain, my whole body tensing and I look up into Ken's eyes as he tells me to trust him and to relax and kisses me again. His fingers move in and out of me and his hand slowly works my shaft. I concentrate on the feeling on my erection rather than the pain in my ass as he slowly, gradually adds another finger. I grit my teeth together and try not to whimper but I think that Ken knows what he's doing, and I trust him. After all, it's not a sharp pain it's just a stinging pain and it's not completely unbearable. Especially if it means that I get to have Ken inside of me...
Ken places one last kiss on my lips and I feel his fingers leave me and his hands move to my hips and slide down underneath me. He asks me if I am ready and I nod and try to watch his face as he pushes his erection into me, but I find that my own eyes are drifting shut. My mouth opens and Ken kisses it, sliding his tongue across mine in the rhythm that his hips move. He starts thrusting into me slowly at first, and then he lifts my hips with his hands and thrusts that way, hitting something inside of me that almost makes me scream. Instead my eyes snap open to watch his face and a gasp and deep moan come from my mouth. His pace slows as he asks if he hurt me and I smile and brush the hair from his forehead and tell him it was exactly the opposite. Then he resumes thrusting hard into me, lifting my hips to meet his and thus bumping my erection against his stomach as he does. It feels so wonderful, the throbbing in my groin and the feeling of Ken's flesh inside of mine driving me to new heights of pleasure. He grunts above me from the strain of having to lift me and pump himself into me at the same time. I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck and whimper loudly as he hits my prostate again. This seems to encourage him because he changes his pace to harder and faster thrusts, not just deep ones. This way he hits my prostate with each thrust and I arc my back as I feel the pleasure gather in the pit of my belly and I empty my balls between us, my sticky white fluid making Ken gasp. I clamp down around him and he moans my name as his body goes rigid and he humps into me a couple more times and I feel him cum inside of me, some of his semen dripping out over my ass and thighs as he gently pulls himself from me.
"Ken...Ken..." I wrap my arms around him as he collapses on top of me. He kisses my heaving chest and wraps his arms around me as well, turning us over so that I'm laying atop him. I lay my head on his chest and wiggle around a little bit so that I'm not lying so much on top of him as I am beside of him and I reach down to pull the sheets over us and I reset my head where it belongs on his chest and lay my hand beside it and stroke it gently. He runs his hand through my hair and kisses the top of my head affectionately, petting me until I fall asleep.
When I awaken Ken is still underneath me sleeping. I smile and kiss his lips, and he wakes and smiles at me. Then, he tells me he loves me. I beam at him and hug his neck, and he sweetly tells me that we can't stay in bed all morning or the others will find us like this. I brush his bangs out of his eyes and send him back over to his bed to sleep after giving him a kiss, lest the others find out about us. He promises me that we can spend every night like last night. I know he doesn't lie because he said he loves me. We fall asleep again facing each other.
Youji waltzed into Omi's and Ken's room to get the two up and briefly took heed of each of their positions. Omi was sprawled out on his stomach with one arm hanging off of the bed and the sheet that was covering him only covering his left leg and the left part of his ass; the rest was bare. Youji raised an eyebrow at the fact that Omi was naked and his and Ken's clothes were strode all over the room and all of his sheets were off of his bed except for one, which was halfway off the bed and only 1/4 of the way in covering him. He looked over at Ken. His bed was completely tidy and he was completely covered and facing Omi. Youji walked over to Ken's bed and slowly lifted up his sheets. He smirked in finding that he was naked and laying on his stomach too. He chuckled and walked over to Omi's bed, where he very carefully attempted to cover the naked boy up with the sheet.
I feel something sliding over my skin like soft silk and I open my eyes to see Youji standing in front of me. Realization wins out over my sleepiness and my eyes go wide as I sit upright in bed and begin to crawl backward. "Y-youji-san!!! It's not what it looks like!!!" I glanced over to Ken, who was sleeping like a log still. I looked back to Youji and he was grinning evilly. "Oh really? Then please tell me what it is because it looks like you and a certain someone had SEX last night." "Y-youji...I..I.." Ken's voice ended the awkwardness. "Go away Youji." Youji turned to Ken, who was now getting his clothes on. He smirked and much to my surprise, did not try to kill Ken but instead walked out the door.
I look to Ken and he smiles to me. "Youji won't say anything. I promise love. I have blackmail on him." This shocks me and I tilt my head to signal enlightenment. Ken chuckles. "He sleeps with Aya." My mouth drops open. I swear I'm going to die of laughter rolling around on my bed. Ken watches me with amusement and finally I manage to ask him a question. "So this will keep our secret safe?" Ken nods to me and walks over and takes my face in his hands, kissing my lips lightly. "Yes, the secret is safe."
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