Classicz

By Libertine

       

Author's Note

These are *my* favourite lines; there's plenty of other funnier ones in there, I'm sure.  Some of them are only really bloody funny in context - but I had to include them too.  I couldn't be bothered going through RWD, TEG and LIBOW.. as well as HP&I.  My all time favourite line, though, has to be the little excerpt which became the basis of the "Did you just moon the Dark Lord" tag, from TEG - though I also love any place where Narcissa and Lucius are being snide together.  And, of course.. Harry, Ron and Charlie watching Draco being chased around the manor grounds by a sex-crazed dragon..

"The Snitch."

"Dragon Rock."
"Lucius Malfoy and the Gift of Mercy."

       

audience partici   -   pation.
Rocky Horror Style.  Perfect entertainment for your average orgy.

       

dedicated much?..
Behind the scenes.

"The Running Jokes."

Spot..
            Malfoy inbreeding, and disturbed ancestors - marriages to horses, banktellers, et al - and of course, the requisite seven toes.  The Veela-poolman connection.  The 'ouchie' chairs.  Remus - the boy who screamed "Severus".  Sirius' odd choice of underwear.  Harry's lack of a haircut.  Dragon blimps.  Dragonsex!Ron - a running joke and plotbunny which went a little too far.  "Well, that was unexpected."  Variations on "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn."  The various over-sexed mirrors.  The mentions of Muggle culture by wizards who -really- shouldn't know about it.  And strange events in the nintendo universe..  Hermione slipping into her dominatrix persona at inopportune times.  Draco being caught in that magic-photo album in all the wrong situations.  Narcissa putting Draco into a skirt when he was six.  Scrabble.

"The fan-Flints - fanon fuck-ups."


"The Quiz."

First person to email me with the correct answers to the quiz will win *gasp* a link for a week on the front page of LHPS - in big letters, thus recieving a heap of diverted site traffic!  And.. a preview of the first four chapters of the next Libertine sequence.. long before anyone else!

Really, guys!  That's a totally cool prize!  It's not lame at all!  <manic giggle>  And you'll get to appear in HP&I!  That's right!  You can make a Mary Sue appearance in the Mary Sue to end all Mary Sues!  Isn't that fucking COOL?

Okay, okay.  It's lame.  But I'm bored and drunk.  Send emails to naejjak@yahoo.com.

       

tha' fanz, yo.
What you've been telling me.  (And Kissaki.  And Rube.)


"What you thought.."

Character most dissed by fans : #1 Draco.  #2 Ron.
Character most pitied by fans : #1 Remus.  #2 Viktor.  #3 Harry.
Characterisations most liked by fans: #1 Lucius.  #2 Hermione.  #3 Narcissa.  #4 Ron.
Author created character most liked:  Sally.
Couple fans most want to see:  #1 Draco/Ron.  #2 Severus/Remus.  #3 Ron/Sally.
Couple fans least want to see:  #1 Draco/Ron.  (Talk about your mixed messages.)
Character least likely to stay in character:  Harry.  (We're working him back to normality.  Slowly.)
Character most people are talking about at the moment:  #1 Remus.  #2 Sally.
Funniest excerpts (according to you):  #1 The blimp episode (LMGoF).  #2 The 'Draco-procreating' episode (LMGoF).  #3 The 'mooning' episode (TEG).  #4 The trick wand episode. (LIBOW)

"Libertine Life.."

Average amount of fanmail Libertine recieves (and replies to) every day: 3 letters.
Average amount of fanmail Libertine would like to receive: 100 letters.  And chocolates!  And cigarettes!  And drugs!  Mmkay?
Average amount of hits on Libertine's site in the past week: 180 per day.
Rating on the google search engine for the thread 'harry potter slash':  2.
Number of dedicated hp-slashfic authors who have actually read Libertine (and dare to admit it, without being forced into doing so):  2.
Number of people Libertine secretly suspects are major Libertine fans:  Everyone who's read this far.  I.E. YOU.


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